Blood Lust
by NeoGirl1704
Summary: We catch up with Bella Swan 25 years after she last saw Edward Cullen. She is a new person, has a new life, a new man, and shares a nightclub, Blood Lust, with her new coven. Everything seems to be perfect, yet nothing is what it seems. ::.NO ECLIPSE.::
1. Blood Lust

**Blood Lust**  
**Ch. 1 – Blood Lust**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or New Moon. But I do own Felicity, Zara, Ayden, Donny, Marx, and Randy. HA.**

**(WARNING: Contains song lyrics, which explains the length. But they're not just there for any reason. Nope, they have a purpose. But you'll just have to find out for what. And if you don't want to read the lyrics, just skip over them.)**

**(A/N: All of the songs below are available to listen to on my profile. I suggest you listen while you read to set the mood.)**

"Ooh," breathed Felicity.

"I love it," stated Zara.

"I _want_ it," I exclaimed, and the girls squealed in delight as I pulled the hanger off the rack of clothes in front of me. I slung it over my arm and we continued to pick through the racks of clothing in the store before us.

"I love shopping," Felicity said after a while once she found a perfect skirt.

"Me too," agreed Zara and I.

We made our way over to the shoe section, and spent another hour just trying them on and walking around in them. Of course each pair looked amazing on us, seeing as we were all vampires, and it was hard to narrow it down so that we left _some_ for the humans.

We each got a pair or two and then checked out. My eyes bugged at the total, and I weakly handed them my credit card.

"We've got to stop doing this," I said as we walked out of the store, five bags slung across our right arms.

"Isabella Marie Swan, you say that every time we spend over five-hundred dollars. Just chill out!" complained Felicity.

I was about to argue, but decided against it. This always happened; I would spend boatloads of money on clothes, feel guilty for a few minutes, and then just end up enjoying myself.

"Let's get home and get ready for tonight! It's gonna be a great show, I can tell," Zara said excitedly as I gently slid the key into the ignition of my car; a Jaguar XKR in midnight black. Sleek, fast, powerful.

Zara was right…tonight's show was going to be insane.

xXXxxXXxxXXxxXXxxXXx

"Hey Randy, you ready for tonight? Of course you are. Anyway, forget the guest list tonight and let's just keep it open for anyone who wants to come in, okay?"

"Sure Bella," Randy replied, and tossed a black clipboard over his shoulder.

"Thanks, you're a doll," I said, pinching his cheek and winking as I walked back inside.

Felicity, Zara, and I owned our own club. It was called 'Blood Lust'. It was open to humans and vampires. We had a stock of animal blood in the back room. The back room was really the vampire's half of the club. We performed at Blood Lust every Friday night. We don't write much of our own material; it's too much fun to cover other bands' songs. The people love us; the humans because we're so beautiful, and the vampires because they finally have a place to hang out and be themselves.

Tonight was the twenty-fifth anniversary of Edward's departure, and the first anniversary of something beautiful. I'm still not sure why he left, but he did. I had known it was coming, so it wasn't as bad that time around. After I was changed from human to vampire and we formed the band and then opened the club, I had things to keep me busy.

Needless to say, I moved on. New men, new memories, new life, new Bella.

_Liar_, the voice in my head accused.

I pushed it back and continued to smile and chat with my 'sisters' as we prepped ourselves for the coming night. We were going all out; new clothes, makeup, hair…everything.

We usually had a theme for every night that we played. We never wore the same thing, but we all wore something that looked similar. Tonight's theme: corset lacing.

"I'll tell you something right now, I can't wait to wear those Go-Go dresses again," Felicity said as she ran her Chi iron through her already straight blonde tresses that ended half-way down her back. She had the trademark topaz eyes and snowy white skin, but she put Rosalie's looks to shame easily; her full lips were coated in gloss, her eyes played up with black eye liner and red eye shadow. Tonight she was wearing a red vinyl dress, ending mid-thigh that laced up her abdomen and bust. The lacing was far-spaced and showed big spots of her flawlessly pale skin, and it was drawn tight over her bust, revealing copious amounts of cleavage. I thought it was a little much, but then again…it was Felicity, and she was rather exuberant.

"Those things were hideous and you know it," Zara said with a wicked grin. She brushed more purple eye shadow over her butterscotch eyes as she glanced over at us from her mirror. Zara had a rather…explosive personality. One thing can set her off, and you better watch your throats. She was not one for dresses; tonight she wore black leather pants that laced up the sides, black heels, and a black shirt that laced up on the sides with a purple dragon in the center. It ended at the bottom of her ribcage, showing her muscular abdomen and belly ring. Her light brown hair with newly added purple streaks to match her outfit was arranged in her natural wavy ringlets that spilled down her back.

"Nah, not hideous, just so uncomfortable," I said with a small shrug as I penciled on more black eyeliner onto my cat-style eyes. My eyes were a mix between topaz and the dark brown that they used to be, ending in a result that I myself thought was rather beautiful; a very light brown. My hair was the same color, but had more shine and volume. I wore it down, straight at the top and ending in soft curls at the bottom. It swung down to my hips. I wore a denim micro-mini skirt, a black satin corset top laced up tight, slip on stiletto heels, and a black newsboy cap perched atop my head and turned slightly to the side. My lips were coated in a layer of fire-engine red lipstick, as were my nails in polish, and I wore a thin layer of red glitter beneath my bottom lashes. A tiny diamond stud in my nose winked up at me, adding definition to my already perfect face.

"Hideously uncomfortable," Zara said, and before we could respond, my cell phone lit up and started playing a catchy little tune; the alarm. It was opening time, and we would play in a few minutes.

Someone knocked on our dressing room and I shot out of my chair, hair flying behind me, to open it before the others could. I beat Felicity by a centimeter.

"Ha," I said, and opened it.

Ayden stood on the other side looking shell-shocked.

"Dang Bella," he said, looking me up and down with a dirty grin.

"Ayden, just because I'm married to you doesn't mean you can ogle," I told him, and he straightened up, saluting me.

"Yes ma'am!" he said in his deep voice, his citrine eyes sparkling with amusement and awe. Ayden and I have been married for a year, and we still acted like newly weds, or so Felix (Felicity's nickname) and Zara informed us constantly. Ayden was absolutely beautiful to me; his deep black hair was a striking contrast to his inhumanly pale skin, and his eyes had more of an orange color than the yellowish brown of your average vampire. He had a strong build, slim but muscular. Tonight he wore a black shirt with words scrawled across it, a white vest, and from around his neck dangled a single sharp shark tooth tied to a black cord that I had bought him. On his lower-half were dark jeans, faded and torn in places, and black Vans.

None of us, with the exception of Zara, ever really dressed like this. We tried to fit in on the streets, wearing your average human's clothing; these were just our show costumes.

I reached up to kiss Ayden gently on the lips, and he grabbed my hand and led me out of the dressing room, Zara and Felix on my heels.

"Five minutes!" yelled someone from the stage who was setting up our instruments.

I took a seat on a black leather couch in the room behind the small stage, and Ayden sat next to me. He pulled me into his lap and wrapped his arms around my torso.

"Happy first anniversary," he whispered in my ear, and I smiled and turned to kiss him. Zara and Felix were used to this kind of thing.

We were interrupted when the rest of the band filed into the room, costumed and ready to perform.

Ayden played lead guitar and sang a couple songs, Donny played the drums, Marx played the bass, and Zara played the keyboard sometimes when she wasn't singing back-up for Felicity and I, who were the lead vocals.

"Everyone knows the play list, right?" I asked for reassurance, and they all nodded.

"Let's give these people a show to remember. It's the first performance of the New Year, and they're all expecting something great. Not that we ever make mistakes, just make sure everything is convincing, and you two," Donny said, pointing at me and Felix, "belt it out. Got it?"

Donny was the one who gave the pep talk before each show, and was, more or less, the leader of the band.

Donny and Felicity had been married for about five years, and Zara and Marx for three. And, of course, Ayden's and my first anniversary was today.

"Got it!" we all said at once, and stood up, smoothing out our clothes. Felix, Zara and I grabbed our microphones, Marx and Ayden grabbed their guitars, and Donny grabbed his drum sticks, and then we ran out onto the stage, jogging at a human pace.

The stage was elevated about two feet up from the dance floor, where humans and vampires mixed; sipping drinks, dancing, talking…the place was swarming with activity, noise, and excitement.

The butterflies fluttered around in my tummy as I looked out at the people, but I was so excited.

"Are you guys ready for some music?" Zara yelled into her microphone, and suddenly the crowd moved over to around the stage and began to cheer.

Our opening piece was 'Call Me When You're Sober' by Evanescence.

_Don't cry to me_  
_If you loved me_  
_You would be here with me_  
_You want me?_  
_Come find me_  
_Make up your mind  
_  
_Should I let you fall?_  
_Lose it all?_  
_So maybe you can remember yourself_  
_Can't keep believing_  
_We're only deceiving  
I'm sick of the lie  
And you're too late_

_Don't cry to me_  
_If you loved me  
You would be here with me  
You want me?  
Come find me  
Make up your mind_

_Can't take the blame_  
_Sick with shame_  
_Must be exhausting_  
_To lose your own game_  
_Selfishly hated_  
_No wonder you're jaded_  
_You can't play the victim this time_  
_And you're too late_

_Don't cry to me_  
_If you loved me_  
_You would be here with me_  
_You want me?_  
_Come find me_  
_Make up your mind_

_You never call me when you're sober_  
_You only want it cause it's over_  
_Oh, oh_  
_It's over_  
_How could I have burned paradise?_  
_How could I – you were never mine_

_So don't cry to me_  
_If you loved me_  
_You would be here with me_  
_Don't lie to me_  
_Just get your things_  
_I made up your mind_

I grinned as I caught my breath and the crowd screamed at us, demanding more. My voice wasn't as gritty and deep as Amy Lee's, but it still sounded good, or at least I thought.

Next, Ayden was up to bat with 'Damn Regret' by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. I put my microphone in the stand for him and he took my place, his guitar hanging from his torso, as the ladies in the crowd nearly fainted at the sight of him.

_The moon is shining bright_  
_The mood is feeling right_  
_I'll kiss you on your neck_  
_People will stare, but we won't care_  
_We're high above the ground_  
_We're nowhere to be found  
_  
_Empowered by adrenaline _  
_Feel I've been born again_  
_Again, I am repeating myself_  
_And I know it is kind for you_  
_To sit and pretend_

_Damn regret, I'll try to forget_  
_Don't worry about me, cause I'm refined_  
_Cast my line to see what's behind_  
_Did you think you'd persuade me to let you go?_

_I'm wishing you were here_  
_My weakness is my fear_  
_Alone I am myself_  
_No reason left for me to care_  
_Distracted by the sound_  
_I hear footsteps all around  
_  
_Empowered by adrenaline_  
_Feel I've been born again_  
_Again, I am repeating myself_  
_And I know it is kind for you_  
_To sit and pretend_

_Damn regret, I'll try to forget_  
_Don't worry about me, cause I'm refined_  
_Cast my line to see what's behind_  
_Did you think you'd persuade me to let you go?_

_You're the only one I turn to_  
_When I feel like no one's there_  
_And when I'm lonely in my darkest hour_  
_You give me the power_  
_To sit and pretend_

_Damn regret, I'll try to forget_  
_Don't worry about me, cause I'm refined_  
_Cast my line to see what's behind_  
_Did you think you'd persuade me to let you go?_

_Did you think I'd forget?_  
_Did you think I'd surrender myself to persuade you to let me go?_  
_Did you think I'd forget?_  
_Did you think I'd surrender myself to persuade you to let me go?_

By the time the song was over, the girls in the crowd, yelling and carrying on, weren't the only ones feeling weak in the knees. He moved back to his spot by Marx, and kissed me suddenly on his way over as I grabbed the microphone from the stand. I loved it when he surprised me like that…

When Felix had waved her hand in my face and I snapped out of staring at him, I felt my face getting hot but I knew I couldn't blush.

"Alright everyone, time to slow it down a little bit," I said into the microphone, and several people left the floor to sit down on one of the sofa's in the corners or to get a drink, while the couples joined and appreciated the fact that they weren't alone.

'Nobody Wins' by The Veronicas was next and Felix played the cello for the song instead of singing, while Zara sang back up and me lead.

_Hold your head up high_  
_You're never wrong_  
_Somewhere in the right, you belong_  
_You would rather fight, than walk away_  
_What a lonely way to breathe the air_  
_What an unlovely way to say you care_  
_Now we're too far gone for me to save_

_And I never thought that we'd come to this_  
_Maybe there's beauty in goodbye_  
_(No one's wrong or right; you would rather fight, than walk away)_  
_There's just no reason left to try_  
_(Now it's gone too far, look at where we are)_  
_You push me away_  
_Another black day_  
_Let's count off the reasons to cry_  
_Look what you missed_  
_Living like this_  
_Nobody wins_

_Searching for the truth in your eyes_  
_Found myself so lost, don't recognize_  
_The person now that you, you claim to be_  
_Don't know when to stop, or where to start_  
_You're just so caught up in who you are_  
_Now you're far too high for me to see_

_And I never thought that we'd come to this_  
_Maybe there's beauty in goodbye_  
_(No one's wrong or right; you would rather fight, than walk away)_  
_There's just no reason left to try_  
_(Now it's gone too far, look at where we are)_  
_You push me away_  
_Another black day_  
_Let's count off the reasons to cry_  
_Look what you missed_  
_Living like this_  
_Nobody wins_

_You never say sorry_  
_Try to tell me that you love me_  
_But don't – it's too late to take it there_

_Maybe there's beauty in goodbye_  
_(No one's wrong or right; you would rather fight, than walk away)_  
_There's just no reason left to try_  
_(Now it's gone too far look at where we are)_  
_You push me away_  
_Another black day_  
_Let's count out the reasons to cry_  
_Look what you missed_  
_Living like this_  
_Nobody wins_  
_(Now it's gone too far, look at where we are)_  
_Nobody wins_

After such a sad song, the couples were extremely appreciative to have each other there with them and not alone.

It was Ayden's turn again with 'Welcome to the Black Parade' by My Chemical Romance.

_When I was a young boy_  
_My father took me into the city_  
_To see a marching band_  
_He said, "Son, when you grow up, _  
_Would you be the savoir of the broken, the beaten, and the damned?"_  
_He said, "Will you defeat them,  
Your demons and all the non-believers, the plans that they have made? _  
_Because on day, I'll leave you,_  
_A phantom, to lead you in the summer, to join the black parade."_

_When I was a young boy_  
_My father took me into the city_  
_To see a marching band_  
_He said, "Son, when you grow up, _  
_Would you be the savoir of the broken, the beaten, and the damned?"_

_Sometimes I get the feeling she's watching over me_  
_And other times I feel like I should go_  
_When through it all the rise and fall_  
_The bodies in the streets  
_  
_And when you're gone we want you all to know we'll carry on_  
_We'll carry on_  
_Though you're dead and gone, believe me your memory will carry on_  
_Carry on  
We'll carry on_

_And in my heart I can't contain it, the anthem won't explain it_  
_And we will send you reeling from decimated dreams_  
_Your misery and hate will kill us all_  
_So paint it black and take it back_  
_Let's shout it loud and clear_  
_Defiant to the end we hear the call to… _

_Carry on_  
_We'll carry on_  
_Though you're dead and gone, believe me your memory will carry on_  
_We'll carry on_  
_And though you're broken and defeated, your weary widow marches on  
_  
_And we carry on through the fears_  
_Disappointed faces of your peers_  
_Take a look at me cause_  
_I could not care at all_  
_Do or die_  
_You'll never make me_  
_Because the world will never take my heart_  
_Go and try, you'll never break me_  
_We want it all_  
_We wanna play this part_  
_Won't explain or say I'm sorry_  
_I'm unashamed, I'm gonna show my scar_  
_You're the chair for all the broken_  
_Listen here, because it's only…_  
_I'm just a man, I'm not a hero_  
_Just a boy, who's meant to sing this song,_  
_Just a man, I'm not a hero_

_I -- Don't -- Care_

_We'll carry on, we'll carry on_  
_And though you're dead and gone, believe me your memory will carry on_  
_You'll carry on_  
_And though you're broken and defeated, your weary widow marches on  
_  
_Do or die_  
_You'll never make me_  
_Because the world will never take my heart_  
_Go and try, you'll never break me_  
_We want it all, _  
_We wanna play this part_  
_Do or die_  
_You'll never make me_  
_Because the world will never take my heart_  
_Go and try, you'll never break me_  
_We want it all  
We wanna play this part_  
_We'll carry on_

The last song, our absolute showstopper was 'Mother, Mother' by The Veronicas. This was our favorite song to perform.

"How would you guys like one last song?" Felix yelled to the crowd through her microphone. We grinned at each other when they screamed, and Donny tapped his sticks in the air before slamming them down on his drums.

_Mother, Mother_  
_Can you hear me?_  
_I'm just calling to say hello_  
_How's the weather? How's my father?_  
_Am I lonely? Heavens no_

_Mother, Mother_  
_Are you listening?_  
_Just a phone call to ease your mind_  
_Life is perfect, never better_  
_Distance making the heart grow blind_

_When you sent me off to see the world_  
_Were you scared that I might get hurt?_  
_Would I try a little tobacco?_  
_Would I keep on hiking up my skirt?_

_I'm hungry_  
_I'm dirty_  
_I'm losin' my mind_  
_EVERYTHING'S FINE!!  
_  
_I'm freezin'_  
_I'm starvin'_  
_I'm bleedin' to death_  
_EVERYTHING'S FINE!!_

The girls and I jumped off the stage at this point, walking through and around the crowd as we sang. I thought that I saw someone that looked an awful lot like Alice Cullen, but I shook it off and concentrated on making my voice as loud as I could.

_Yeah I'm workin', making money_  
_I'm just starting to build a name_  
_I can feel it around the corner_  
_I can make it any day_

_Mother, Mother, can you hear me?_  
_Yeah I'm sober, sure I'm sane_  
_Life is perfect, never better_  
_Still your daughter, still the same  
_  
_If I tell you what you wanna hear_  
_Will it help you to sleep well at night?_  
_Are you sure that I'm your perfect dear?_  
_Now just cuddle up and sleep tight_

_I'm hungry_  
_I'm dirty_  
_I'm losin' my mind_  
_EVERYTHING'S FINE!!_

_I'm freezin'_  
_I'm starvin'_  
_I'm bleedin' to death_  
_EVERYTHING'S FINE!!_

_I miss you_  
_I love you_

"THANK YOU, SEATTLE!" everyone in the band screamed, throwing their fists in the air.

Everyone in the crowd went _crazy_ as we climbed back onto the stage. I wavered on the edge for a very scary second, but then somebody with very cold hands steadied me from the crowd and helped me back up. I didn't catch who it was, but their touch was very familiar. Too familiar.

I was scanning the crowd desperately trying to find him, but then the band started playing again and I whipped my head around, giving them looks like they were crazy. Did I miss something? I recognized the song but I knew that we never rehearsed this before, and I had never sang it. I looked over at Ayden, but his confusion mimicked mine.

Just then, Zara and Felix stepped forward, smiles on their faces, and grabbed Ayden's hand. He took off his guitar, handed it to Zara, and Felix led him over to me.

"What's going on?" I whispered, but he just shrugged.

"Tonight is Ayden and Bella's first anniversary, and we all want to wish you a happy anniversary by singing the song that was playing when you two met," Felix said with a huge grin.

My hand was clamped over my mouth in surprise, and Ayden's eyes were wide. 'Only One' by Yellowcard began to play.

"May I have this dance?" he asked me, and I dropped my hand and smiled at him. He took my hand in his and put his other on my waist, mine on his shoulder, and we danced.

_Broken this fragile thing now_  
_And I can't, I can't pick up the pieces_  
_And I've thrown my words all around_  
_But I can't, I can't give you a reason_  
_I feel so broken up, and I give up_  
_I just wanna tell you so you know_

_Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you_  
_You are my only one_  
_I let go_  
_There's just no one that gets me like you do_  
_You are my only, my only one_

_Made my mistakes, let you down_  
_And I can't, I can't hold on for too long_  
_Ran my whole life in the ground_  
_And I can't, I can't get up when you're gone_  
_And something's breaking up_  
_I feel like giving up_  
_I won't walk out until you know_

_Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you_  
_You are my only one_  
_I let go_  
_There's just no one that gets me like you do_  
_You are my only, my only one_

_Here I go, so dishonestly_  
_Leave a note for you, my only one_  
_And I know, you can see right through me_  
_So let me go, and you will find someone_

_Here I go, scream my lungs and try to get to you_  
_You are my only one_  
_I let go, there's just no one, no one like you_  
_You are my only, my only one_  
_My only one_  
_My only one_  
_My only one_  
_You are my only, my only one_

Ayden whispered the words in my ear, and when it was over, he kissed me sweetly on the lips. Zara had to cough to get our attention, and we saw that the crowd had gone back to dancing when the DJ took over the play list.

"Thanks so much you guys!" I exclaimed, hugging everyone in the band along with Ayden, who clapped the men on the back instead of hugging them.

"It was nothing," Zara said, waving her hand in the air with a grin.

"Let's go get a drink and dance," suggested Felix, and we all agreed and exited the stage, Ayden helping me down, and walked over to the bar. We ordered Bloody Mary's ((heh heh)) and pushed through the shoulder-to-shoulder crowd to find an empty couch, on which we sat and chatted about the show and what songs to play next week.

A beautiful blonde vampire with blonde hair strutted by, and made eye contact with me as she passed.

"Rosalie?" I whispered in awe, knowing she could hear me.

She gave me an icy grin and winked evilly, then disappeared into the crowd.

"What'd you say Bella?" Ayden asked, but I shook my head and downed my drink in two gulps, then went to order another one.

This was going to be a long night.

**(A/N: So how did you like it? Please review and I'll know whether to continue or not, ok? Oh, you can listen to all the songs if you follow the links I provided on my profile. Just scroll through my profile and you'll see them.)**


	2. Predator and Prey

**Blood Lust**  
**Ch. 2 – Predator and Prey**

**Disclaimer: The last time I checked, Stephenie hadn't transferred the rights of Twilight and New Moon to me yet. Hurry up Steph!!**

**(A/N: Thanks so much to all of my reviewers and my faithful readers! I went a little overboard on the lyrics the last chapter, but there are none in this one. I promise.)**

**(Warning: Mild language.)**

"Thanks," I said to the bartender as he handed me another drink. I chugged it, and he refilled it. It was the perfect mix of cougar's blood and vodka, and it really hit the spot.

"No problem Bella," the vampire said with a grin.

I tried to match his smile, but it looked more like a grimace. I carried my drink over to where Ayden and the others were sitting, and sat down in Ayden's lap, pulling him close for a kiss, full of passion and fear.

"What was that for?" he asked, his voice husky, after I pulled away.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and leaned my ear against his strong chest, listening to the silence of his still heart. I kept looking behind me nervously, and every time somebody passed us I jumped.

"Are you okay Bella?" Zara asked.

I shook my head weakly, and she glanced over at Felix, who acted immediately. Time slowed down. Everyone around us stopped moving. Then they all began to move backwards, undoing everything that had just been completed. A broken glass flew up from the ground, rejoined with its broken counterparts, and the fluid was gathered from the floor and put back in it. It kept rewinding, and I watched as Rosalie strutted backwards in front of us, reversing her evil grin and wink, causing me to shudder. Then time slowed again, all movement except ours ceased, and it fast-forwarded until we were back to the present.

Zara then closed her eyes and extended a faintly glowing hand towards me, and, placing it on mine, I suddenly forgot everything about Rosalie, seeing what could have been Alice, and the familiar touch of Edward's hands as he helped me up on the stage. My mood improved and the drink worked through my system, calming my nerves and stirring excitement as the next song played.

Zara and Felicity looked over at me, the same excitement in their eyes, as Shakira's 'Hips Don't Lie' was produced at maximum volume from the speakers. A huge grin broke out on my face, and we all giggled as we got up and rushed over to the crowd of people. We tore it up, to say the least, and the circle that formed around us hollered as Ayden, Donny, and Marx broke through the crowd and joined us in our rendezvous of less than chaste dancing. Apparently we weren't the only vampires who craved the wild pulse of the song; 3/4's of the rest of the vampires in the club were dancing, and several even came and joined our circle. The human girls looked on jealously as all the men in the room watched us go, and when the song ended they were basically drooling everywhere.

Laughing, we all went back to our reserved corner where a fresh round of drinks was found waiting for us. We gladly drained our glasses, the warm blood flowing down our throats, and soon my head was spinning, for I had consumed more than the others tonight.

We noticed that some of the people were starting to trickle out the doors slowly to find another nightclub, probably with more live performances.

"Let's give these fools an encore," I suggested, and the band followed me. Zara, Donny, Marx, and Ayden went up to the stage so they could play, and Felix and I grabbed our microphones and sat on the edge of the stage. The music started, and we raised the microphones to our lips, letting our legs dangle over the edge of the stage.

First on the list was 'Crazy Bitch' by Buckcherry, and oh my gosh it drew the crowd like _fruit flies_ screaming the lyrics and dancing like there was absolutely no tomorrow. It was most fun when Felix and I would be dancing in the crowd as we sang, and then stop singing and let the crowd yell "HEY, you're a crazy bitch!"

Second was 'Get Over It' by Ok Go. Unable to resist the urge, we ran up to the bar and danced along the glass top, **(A/N: No, they weren't stripping or being whores…this is Bella we're talking about here, and though the drinking and the above song is a bit un-Bella, that doesn't make her a whore.)** belting out the lyrics and staying perfectly in-tune with each other.

The night was long and the most fun I had had in months. After singing for another hour and a half, we commenced and let the DJ off of his elongated break.

"Hey, you're a crazy bitch," Ayden whispered in my ear as we were relaxing. This sent me into a fit of giggles, and I clutched my sides as if I were keeping myself together. For some reason this was very hilarious, and I struggled to breathe as the laughs escaped my parted lips.

The bartend kept pouring the drinks, and I lost my head before long. Everything was funny and I wanted to dance to every song the DJ played.

"Come on Bells, let's go sit down and talk with the others," Ayden said after a while. He didn't like to dance for long periods of time.

"Aw come on, one more," I begged, thrusting out my lower lip into a pout. He was used to this though, and he was able to refuse.

"I'm gonna go sit down Bella, come on," Ayden pressed, but somebody with striking bronze hair stepped up besides him.

"I'll dance with you," he said in his sweet velvet voice, and Ayden glanced over at him. We trusted each other a _lot_ and we would both be more than faithful till the end.

"Alright, we'll be right over there okay?" Ayden asked reluctantly, speaking to me as if I were a child and pointing to the corner, where Zara was waving at me.

I waved back, and Ayden walked away. I turned to the person who offered to dance with me, and I didn't care who he was. Yeah, everything about him was familiar, but my brain wasn't working at the moment. A good song came on and we danced and danced, but when he brushed his unmarked left hand against my left hand, clearly marked by the princess-cut diamond wedding band, by accident, I stopped dead. Squinting to make sense of his face, my vision went from blurry to clear and then I was able to focus on the bronze messy hair, the bright topaz eyes gleaming happily from his beautifully graceful face.

"Edward," I whispered, feeling embarrassed all of a sudden.

I stepped back to put some distance between us, but, being me, I tripped over my high heel and was about to hit the floor when strong arms caught me and I looked up into the eyes of Emmett. I untangled myself quickly and took another step, this time to the left, but Rosalie closed in on me. I turned around to go the other way, but Alice and Jasper blocked my departure.

"Bella, we need to talk," Edward said, and my eyes widened in fear.

Twenty-five years.

This could not be happening.

Finding no way out of their circle, I ripped my hat from my head, dropped to my knees and crawled between his legs, yanking my skirt down in the back, and made my way through the crowd of people, crawling underneath them, getting my hands stepped on, and finally I broke out of the throng of partygoers. I stood up too fast and my head swam. I staggered forward, my drunken sprint across the room to get to Ayden as fast as I could looking rather pathetic. He stood up immediately, his face etched with concern and worry, along with Donny, Marx, Felicity, and Zara. The Cullen's were watching me from the edge of the dance floor, and I glanced over my shoulder at them, feeling like predator and prey.

Guess which one I was.

"We need to go," I said urgently. Nobody moved; they were staring at the Cullen's with curiosity.

"Now!" I barked, and they all looked down at me.

"I'll take her home," Ayden said.

"We'll stay here and close up. Feel better Bella," Zara said, and the others bade us goodbye. It seemed like an eternity, but finally we were headed towards the door. I could barely walk because of the alcohol content of my body, and Ayden simply picked me up and carried me across the club bridal-style. To the others there it must have looked like a romantic exit, but to me, it was an escape from something deadly. When he turned around to push the door open with his back, I caught Edward's eyes. They were full of pain, hate, love, jealousy, and a thousand other emotions, and it made me sick to my stomach.

The tinted glass door of the club swung shut, and I could feel all my drinks coming up.

"Put me down, I'm gonna be sick," I whispered to Ayden, and he set me down immediately. I stumbled over to the bushes and he held my hair back for me. As I wretched and the night splashed into the dirt flowerbed, my head cleared since the alcohol was leaving my system. It never seemed to end, I must have drunk more than I realized…

The little bell that hung at the top of the door of the entrance to the club chimed, and I heard Edward exclaim, "Bella!" with worry.

I stood up, my knees shaking, and wiped my mouth on the back of my hand.

"I'm fine," I rasped, and stalked towards my Jaguar, Ayden by my side. Completely sober, I felt refreshed and rather pissed at my ex.

_Ouch_, I thought to myself as I used the word that I thought would never apply to Edward.

I walked on, wobbling because stilettos and cobblestone just don't mix. My heel caught in a crack and I tripped forward, but before Ayden could react, Edward was there, holding my arm so I wouldn't fall.

"Hey man, back off," Ayden said angrily as he saw Edward, who was not letting go of my arm even though I was trying to wiggle from his grasp. Edward, feeling the anger and protectiveness radiating off of Ayden, obeyed and released my arm.

"What do you want, Edward?" I asked coldly after he refused to leave.

I saw Ayden's expression change from confusion to understanding as he realized that Edward was not just some random guy; he was the Edward.

THE. Edward.

"You, Bella. I want you," Edward said bluntly, but I glared up at him.

"No. Go away," I said. He kept walking next to me, too close for comfort.

"Please, let's just talk," he said.

"No. Go away."

"It's so great to see you Bella, I can't believe you're a vam--," he continued.

"I _said_ go away," I repeated. But he didn't budge.

_Stupid, stubborn-ass vampire_, I thought to myself angrily

"Bella, just talk to me," Edward pleaded.

"What part don't you get? The 'no' part or the 'go away' part?" I demanded.

Ayden was having an internal battle with himself. His hands were balled into fists, his teeth clenched, and I could have sworn I saw his eye twitch.

We got to the car, and I went to open the passenger door, but Edward reached out and grabbed my wrist.

"Please, Bella, just for a few minutes," he begged.

Finally, Ayden's temper had broken through.

"What the hell is your problem? She said leave!" Ayden yelled, shoving Edward back roughly.

Edward's eyes turned black with rage as Ayden shoved him, and he was advancing forward to kick Ayden's ass when I ran between them, staring at Edward with a look so dirty it would have melted glass.

"Don't. Touch. Him," I spat, and he stopped in his tracks, mid-step.

Ayden grabbed my hand and basically shoved me in the car, very gently, then got in himself, jammed the key in the ignition. The engine purred to life, the only sound available to focus on.

I didn't take another look at Edward Cullen as my husband pulled away from the night club and drove me home.


	3. I Hate Airplanes

**Blood Lust**  
**Ch. 3– I Hate Airplanes**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or New Moon, or any of the characters from those books. All other characters, however, I do own.**

**(A/N: Thanks so much for all the supportive reviews! I am definitely going to continue on with the story. Thanks again, lovely readers and reviewers!)**

"That was Edward Cullen?" Ayden asked in disbelief as he opened the door for me leading into our home. We lived in an apartment a few blocks away from the club. The entire car ride home had been silent as I brooded and plotted the death of Edward.

"Yes, that indeed was none other than Edward Cullen himself," I said bitterly as I walked through the door.

I stalked into our bedroom, removed my shoes, and threw them in the closet. If I had thrown them as hard as I first intended to, the headlines would be reading, "Freak Accident: Innocent Bystander Killed by Flying Shoe". This thought caused me to grin at my stupidity, but I quickly sobered and my eyebrows descended upon my eyes once again in anger and frustration.

"What the hell was his problem? Was he always _that_ persistent?" Ayden asked from the living room.

"By persistent do you mean annoying? Then the answer is yes," I answered.

"Does he al-,"

"I'm going to take a shower, ok?" I said irritably, cutting him off.

I slammed our bedroom door, undressed at top speed, and, once in the shower, surrendered to the calming pulse of the water leaving the faucet in the wall. I allowed it to slowly but surely put out the flame of anger that was raging inside of me. I massaged the shampoo into my hair, rinsed and replaced it with conditioner, and then scrubbed my body with delicately scented soap.

With a towel wrapped around my wet hair and a robe securely tied around my body, I emerged from the bathroom and sat down next to Ayden on the couch, who was watching a sports program.

"All better?" he asked, knowing me too well.

"Much, thanks for asking," I said, and he nodded.

"Can I ask all of my annoying questions now?" he pressed, raising his eyebrows in hope.

"If you must."

"I must."

"Well then, where to start?"

"How about…why did he leave in the first place twenty-five years ago?" Ayden asked tentatively, hoping not to upset me.

"I honestly have no idea. He didn't leave anything, not a note, a letter, a picture…he didn't even say goodbye," I replied, crossing my legs and folding my hands over my knee.

"Why did you come crawling out of the crowd of dancers like that?" he asked, and his grip around my shoulders tightened; protection out of instinct.

"They…they swarmed on me like white on rice. I thought it was just Edward dancing with me, but apparently they had been there the whole time, and once I realized who he was…they didn't want me to leave," I said, my eyebrows furling in confusion. I had danced with Edward and I didn't even know it…

"By 'they' you mean all of the family?"

"Yes, but Carlisle and Esme – the parents – weren't there," I answered.

"I wouldn't think so. Parents don't usually accompany their offspring, adoptive or biological, to night clubs," Ayden said thoughtfully.

"They're not much of a partying type," I said with a small shrug.

"You were so mad. I'm sorry I let him grab your arm like that. I shouldn't have let that bastard near you," Ayden apologized, kissing my cheek briefly.

Even though I referred to Edward as a bastard on more than one occasion, it still hurt me a tiny bit to hear Ayden speaking so harshly of him. I brushed these thoughts away and smiled up at Ayden instead.

"It's okay, you didn't know."

"Happy Anniversary," he said, surprising me again as he interlaced his fingers with mine. All of my anger had occupied my brain, causing me to forget that it was our first wedding anniversary for a few hours.

"Thank you Ayden. That means a lot to me that you aren't looking for a way out right now, or going behind my back or something. I love you so much and I trust you," I said to him, hugging him tightly.

Because my face was buried in his chest, I missed the furrowing of his eyebrows as I said this.

"Thank you Bella," he said sweetly. "Sorry we couldn't do anything special. It's not like vampires can go out to dinner or anything," he added with a small shrug.

I smiled against his chest, and he drew my face up with a gentle tug of his hand.

"What? Did I miss something?" he asked as he felt my smile.

"No, we're still on time. We haven't missed it yet," I said, leading him on.

"Missed what?"

I disappeared for a millisecond, rushing into my room and grabbing something from a drawer, and then was in his arms again before he could blink.

"Happy Anniversary," I said, and handed him the envelope.

Ayden read the papers, his eyes scanning over the small print quickly.

"We're going to Greenland?" he asked, not understanding, but then his eyes lit up.

"We're going to Greenland! We're going to Greenland!" my husband exclaimed, flinging himself off the couch and dancing around our living room.

He stopped suddenly and peered over at me. "Why are we going to Greenland?"

"Haven't you always wanted to hunt polar bears?" I asked, remembering what he told me during the first few days of our dating.

"There's polar bears in Greenland?" he whispered in amazement, his eyes going as huge as dinner plates.

I glanced over at the wall quickly, confusion on my face.

_Is he serious_? I thought to myself, but his innocence made me grin.

"Yes honey, there are polar bears in Greenland," I said slowly, and he started to squeal…_squeal_…as he ran around the living room in circles, clapping and jumping up in the air every now and then like a child that has just found that Santa has come.

"Are you alright?" I asked, and then I found myself being picked up by the forearms and running around in circles with him.

"Put me down! Put me down right now!" I shrieked, watching the room spin around with a surprising amount of clarity.

"When do we leave?" he asked me, stopping suddenly. My hair flew by me, still moving, and I replied, "Tomorrow at noon."

In response he planted a sloppy kiss on my cheek, flung me over his shoulder, and ran us into our bedroom, slamming the door behind him.

xxXXxxXXxxXXxxXXxxXXxxXXxx

"Have you seen my belt?" Ayden asked the next morning as he pulled his jeans on.

"Which one?" I called from the bathroom, where I was applying foundation over the deep circles under my eyes.

"Just the plain black one," he replied, and I could hear him rummaging through the drawers in the kitchen.

"Hanging on the rack in the closet…with the rest of them," I replied, running the brush through my silky chocolate brown hair.

He thanked me, and then I emerged from the bathroom, fully clothed and my luggage by the front door, ready to go. Ayden was still shirtless, however, and was tightening his belt around his flawless waist.

As I passed him to get my shoes from the closet, I couldn't help but run my hand over his chiseled six-pack. He jumped back with a grin.

"That tickles," he complained as I slipped my feet into my black pumps.

"I know honey, but you're so irresistible," I said with a wink.

"The same could be said about you," he replied, and he planted a kiss on my lips before he buttoned up his white shirt.

I grinned and after fastening my pearl necklace around my neck I exited our bedroom and quickly made sure that Ayden had all of his stuff packed.

"Uh, baby? You forgot to pack underwear," I reminded him, shaking my head.

In response, ten pairs of boxers flew from our bedroom, neatly folded, and landed in my arms.

"Thanks!" I called, and put them in his rolling suitcase.

I quickly looked myself over in the mirror; I wore a gray Jersey-Knit dress that ended at my knees. It was sleeveless and had black lace detailing around the bust. On my legs I wore black pantyhose and black pumps. Ayden was beside me suddenly, and looked great in light distressed jeans, brown leather shoes with a squared toe, and a white button-up shirt.

"Let's go!" he said excitedly, and I opened the door so he could step out and load my Jaguar with our luggage for the week we were spending in Greenland. Before he picked everything up, however, he picked up my jacket from the coat rack next to the door and held it out for me. I slipped my arms into the black knit sweater, and then he was gone. I shut out the lights and closed and locked the front door, then made my way down the steps leading away from our second-story flat.

Ayden was waiting patiently for me in the front seat, and I climbed in beside him. As soon as the door swung shut on its hinges, he was speeding out of the parking lot and down the road. We made casual conversation on the way to the airport, and once there we rented a luggage rack and pushed our stuff to the counter where we checked it in. I had some jewelry in my suitcase that Ayden had bought me for my birthday last year, and I wanted it to be taken care of properly.

"Excuse me, sir?" I asked, my voice alluring and eyes blazing, as I leaned across the counter to speak to the young man sitting at the counter as he tagged our luggage.

"Y-yes ma'am?" he replied after he caught the bead of drool leaving his mouth.

"If you don't mind, there are some very important things in my case, that one there, and I need it taken care of very well please," I breathed, blowing my sweet venom-tainted breath in his general direction.

He nodded eagerly, eyes wide, and slapped a 'FRAGILE' sticker on the side.

"You're terrible," Ayden giggled as we walked away, rolling our carry-on bags behind us.

"I know, but those earrings are in there," I said, taking a seat in the waiting area next to our boarding ramp.

"Aw, you like those huh?" he asked, and I nodded fervently and said 'yes'.

He kissed me then, taking my breath away, and held my hand in his own.

"No PDA!" said a deep voice behind me, and I whirled around at the familiar pitch and glared at Donny.

"You jerk," I mumbled, but the look on his face extracted a grin on my own.

"He can't help himself," Zara said with a shrug.

"Anyway, we just wanted to come and tell you guys to have a good flight, don't fight, and enjoy yourselves. The club won't burn and we'll take care of everything as if you were doing it yourselves," Felicity assured me then, and they all nodded.

"Oh thanks you guys. That means a lot to me," I said with a smile, rushing up to hug them all.

"Flight 67 now boarding!" came a pleasant voice from the loudspeaker.

_I love airplanes_, I thought to myself with a happy sigh.

"Come on babe, that's us!" Ayden said excitedly as he pulled away from Zara, who was hugging him a little harder than normal.

"We'll come back in one piece. See you in a week!" I said to her, and waved at them. They grinned and snapped a picture of us as we walked through the tunnel connected to the airplane from the airport.

About a half-hour later, the plane was taking off. I was sitting in the middle of three seats. Ayden got the one next to the window, but the one next to the aisle was empty. There was a CD there so I suppose the person was in the bathroom or something and not missing their flight. I took my jacket off and folded it carefully, then put it in my carry-on bag beneath my seat.

I closed my eyes and put one of my ear buds in, giving the other to Ayden. The length of the cord made us lean our foreheads together to listen, but that was just fine with either of us. I lay my head back on the seat, still touching his forehead with mine, and sank into a stupor. That was the closest I could come to sleep…the beloved stupor where your thoughts run wild and time almost flies. But never did sleep relieve me of my consciousness. It seemed like if I just stayed in the stupor long enough sleep would come…but I was interrupted when my neighbor, who apparently was back in his seat, found it appropriate to scoot my arm over on the arm rest and place their own there instead.

My eyes opened and I turned my head to protest, when I found myself reflected in deep eyes of brilliant topaz that belonged to the beautiful face of Edward Cullen.

I started so violently that my knees bumped the unfolded table in front of me, where a steaming cup of coffee was sitting thanks to the annoying stewardess, and it spilled in Ayden's lap.

"Hot!" he yelped, jumping up from his seat and slamming his head into the luggage rack above. His head left a round indentation in it, and the sound rang through the airplane, but he was too busy brushing the hot coffee off his steaming crotch to take much notice. Of course it didn't really burn, but it would look peculiar to a human if a man just had five-hundred degree liquid spilled in the No-No Zone and had no reaction to it.

"Oh baby I'm sorry!" I exclaimed as I flung myself out of my seat to help my husband just like a good wife should. My head made contact with the luggage rack, too, and now there were twin indentations in it. Poor airplane…

I grabbed a napkin and began to dab at his pants until the napkin was soaked with coffee. The entire cabin was turned around staring at us, some laughing, some bleary-eyed and annoyed.

Finally the stupid stewardess brought a stack of napkins and I grabbed them from her hand, thrusting some into the hand of the whining Ayden and keeping some in my hand to soak the drink up still.

The drama was over, however, in about five minutes, where I apologized to Ayden a million and one times, and glared at the smirking Edward. Once I had calmed Ayden down enough to sit back in his seat, I sat down myself and turned to Edward.

"Congratulations, you ass," I hissed venomously, glaring at him.

"Ooh, have we snakes on a plane?" he teased, and, infuriated, I huffed and turned back to Ayden, opened my mouth to say something, but then turned back to Edward again.

"Why in the world are you sitting on _this_ plane, going to the _same_ place we are, and sitting in the seat next to _me_?" I asked, still upset.

"Well, after you basically told me to F-off last night, I figured that I should…get away…for a while. And it just so happens that I've always wanted to see Greenland and its natural beauty. So I bought a ticket or two and here we are," Edward explained, being quiet about it.

"Is that so? Because I think it just may have _happened_ that a certain sister of yours may have predicted that we were going somewhere, and it just so _happened_ that Greenland's 'natural beauty' registered in your block head before the words even left her mouth…and lo and behold seat 27A just _happened_ to be open. Thanks to you, this plane ride is completely ruined," I shot back, smirking at him that I had guessed his plan.

Edward's dazzling half-smile caught me by surprise.

"Actually," he said, pulling his wallet out of his pocket and flipping it open, extracting a crisp $50 dollar bill, "you're quite right. I bet against said sister, you see, and lost. So now, thanks to you, I'm out fifty bucks," he replied smoothly, reaching forward and dropping the bill into the seat in front of us that I thought was empty.

"But sitting next to you was a bonus," he whispered.

Alice Cullen's spiky black hair appeared over the seat in front of Edward, and soon her face emerged.

"I told you!" she exclaimed in a hushed tone. "Hi Bella!" she added brightly with a huge smile, showing all of her perfect white teeth.

"Hey Alice," I said in monotone, giving her a tiny smile back that resembled a grimace.

Somebody from behind reached forward to poke me on the back, but I reached behind me and caught the thick finger before it could make contact with my skin.

"Yes?" I asked, turning around.

"Just wanted to say hi," Emmett replied with a boyish smile. Jasper waved at me next, sitting beside his brother. Rosalie's piercing eyes glanced up at my face from her book, and she acknowledged me not.

I let Emmett have his finger back, and then I turned back around to see Esme and Carlisle peering at me from their seats in front of us next to Alice.

"Hi sweetheart!" Esme exclaimed with a huge smile. Carlisle grinned at me.

So they had done it again.

And now I was stuck with the entire Cullen clan in a long, shiny, silver tube hurtling through the sky.

For the remaining eighteen hours and forty-five minutes of our Anniversary flight.

With a sigh, I pinched the bridge of my nose and closed my eyes.

I hate airplanes.


	4. Snowballs

**Blood Lust**  
**Ch. 4 – Snowballs**

"Come on Bells," Ayden urged, nudging me in the side gently with his elbow.

"No. I won't do it," I replied, folding my arms tighter across my chest.

The entire airplane was empty.

The Cullen's were gone.

The newborn across the aisle who cried for the _entire_ flight was gone.

The man two rows down from me who picked his nose for an hour straight was gone.

They were all enjoying the scenery of Greenland, with its massive glaciers, the ice-cappyness, and the massive polar bears filled with hot, oxygenated blood.

"Isabella, Greenland is huge. Trust me, they won't be anywhere _near_ us! It will be a week for you and me together," Ayden said.

"Just us," he added in a whisper.

He glanced behind him at the airport's landing strip, with the giant snowplows raking the fresh snow off of the asphalt.

"I absolutely refuse to be on the same continent as…as _them!_" I hissed back in a furious whisper.

"You've been living on the same continent with them for the last twenty or so years," Ayden pointed out.

"But…but they – ", I began, but stopped short when I couldn't think of a legible reason as to why I wouldn't share Greenland with the Cullen family.

Ayden cocked an eyebrow, waiting for my response.

"But they what?" he pressed.

I glared at him, and then at the stewardess who kept sighing loudly and checking her watch as we continued to sit there, arguing.

"Oh…fine," I mumbled, throwing my jacket over my shoulders as I stood up, careful to avoid the overhead storage above, and yanked my bag down.

Ayden smiled triumphantly as he strode down the aisle behind me.

"But I'm not happy about it!" I said suddenly, whipping around and pointing my finger at him, poking him hard in the chest.

"Ow!" he protested, rubbing where my finger probably left an indention in his cold, dead skin.

I fought to hide my smile by turning around and exiting the airplane quickly.

Ayden and I had already made up by the time we reached the end of the fold-up hallway that connects the airport to the airplane. We stepped out into the gate, and wove our way carefully through the people. Most of them had coats slung over their shoulders and scarves tied around their ears, their cheeks a bright, lively pink.

"See? No unwanted visitors here," Ayden whispered, wrapping his arm around my waist as he led me through the airport.

"So far," I added.

We walked through hallways.

We got our luggage.

We left the airport.

We rented a car, a really great Mercedes.

And still no Cullen's.

"Maybe you were right. I should trust you more often!" I told Ayden as I pulled into the driveway of the little wooden cabin, covered in snow, that we would be staying in.

Ayden flinched the tiniest fraction of a centimeter as I said this, but before I could press into the issue, I saw the little chimney puffing away at the cabin next to us.

"And look, we have neighbors!" Ayden exclaimed happily as I parked the car underneath the little veranda that hung out a couple feet from the cabin.

We unloaded all of our luggage and carried it inside, unpacked our clothes into the closet and the dresser, and Ayden built a fire. I changed clothes to a pair of jeans and a white knit turtleneck sweater. We collapsed onto the couch in a pile, then rearranged ourselves so I was leaning against his chest, his arm around me, as we watched the angry flames devour the wood in the fireplace.

I was perfectly content watching the fire, soaking in the waves of heat radiating off of it, when Ayden spoke up.

"You know, I could sit here all day and watch a giant fire burn trees down to ashes, but I'd rather be outside, frolicking in the snow, building snowmen, hunting polar bears…," Ayden said, trailing off suggestively and waggling his eyebrows.

"Yes, I'm sure the humans next to us would love to watch as two people tackle a couple of the most irascible bears in the world and suck 'em dry," I said, thrusting my fist through the air with emphasis.

"Who said they were humans?"

"What do you want to do, go over there and ask them if they're mythological creatures? Um, no!"

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but I am not a mythological creature! Even though an ass like mine is only heard of in fairy tales."

"No, you are not a mythological creature" I sighed wistfully. "But you _are_ retarded."

"Yep," Ayden agreed. "Hey!" he said in protest when he understood what I had said.

I laughed as I flung myself from his arms and ran towards the door, throwing my scarf around my neck, stuffing my socked feet into my snow boots, and zipping my coat up before I ran outside.

I stopped on the porch after slamming the door accidentally behind me, and looked out at the barren landscape. I sucked in a breath of freezing air, feeling it all the way down to my toes, and exhaled slowly. I took a step forward, my boot crunching through the snow with a delightful sound. I took another, and another, and then _WHAM!_

I staggered over to the side pathetically and my head made contact with the cold ground before I could blink.

"What have you done?!" Ayden exclaimed as he saw me on the ground. He must have left the door open because I never heard it close.

I sat up, rubbing the side of my head.

"Sorry Bella, that wasn't meant for you!" a deep, booming voice called over to us.

Ayden stifled a snicker well with a cough, and pried something off the side of my head. He held it up for me; it was a ball of packed snow, with the perfect imprint of my ear, complete with earrings, in the side of it.

Emmett came bounding over to us, shirtless, and Jasper trailed reluctantly behind him, fully clothed.

"Were you trying to _kill_ somebody?" I asked in amazement before anger caught up with me.

"Do you have any idea how much force it takes to knock me over?" I exclaimed.

"Sorry?" Emmett said, smiling.

"You're gonna be!" I yelled, launching myself at him. I smacked into him and we rolled through the snow. He was so shocked that I was actually hitting him that he only held onto my forearms as we continued to roll, gaining momentum. We stopped, finally, at the foot of the hill that the two cabins were on, and I could barely move through the amount of snow we had collected.

I was still yelling all kinds of curses and profanities at him in fluent Greek when somebody reached through the giant snowball that was us and picked me up off of Emmett, holding me in the air.

"Is she speaking in tongues?" asked a frightened Emmett in disbelief, staring up at me.

I flailed, punched, and kicked at air, but Ayden was too strong and I couldn't get myself out of his grasp. Everyone just stared at me…Emmett, Alice, Edward…they were all there, watching my tantrum.

"To answer your question Emmett," Ayden replied to him calmly, "when she gets extremely angry, she speaks in Greek," he said with a small shrug, still holding tight to my arms.

I was beginning to wear myself out and my flailing slowed down, and eventually the profanities stopped.

I dropped my limbs in defeat, yet Ayden continued to hold me out, two feet in the air, a foot away from his body, as he spoke with the Cullen's, who were now crowded around us.

"Did she hurt you?" Ayden asked Emmett. Though he was about three inches shorter and a lot less muscular than Emmett, Ayden took authority over the situation.

I folded my arms with a sigh and crossed my legs as if I were sitting in a chair, waiting patiently for Ayden to finish.

"Of course not!" Emmett boasted, holding his arm casually behind his back. At the angle I was at, I could see the bright red scratches healing already.

"Good. I'm sorry about this," Ayden said, looking down at me.

"Does it happen often?" Alice pressed, looking interested.

"Never before," he replied, still watching me carefully.

"You can put me down now," I said in a quiet voice, and obediently Ayden dropped me.

"Thanks," I mumbled, picking myself up off the snow heavily.

"Now I want you to apologize to Emmett here," Ayden said, motioning to my victim, and I looked up at him like he was on crack.

"You're not my dad!" I protested stubbornly, folding my arms.

"No, but I am your husband, and I would like you to apologize to him," my equally-as-stubborn husband insisted.

After a minute of staring at the ground, the words escaped my lips.

"Imsorry," I whispered quickly, looking at the ground.

"I didn't quite catch that," said Ayden.

"I'm sorry," I said, adding a space between the words but saying them just as quiet.

"A little louder please," he pressed.

"I'M SORRY!" I yelled at Emmett, my hands curling into fists. I stalked angrily up the hill that I slid down, my face burning with an invisible blush of embarrassment. I was embarrassed because I really _was_ sorry. I felt horrible for attacking Emmett. He had never done anything but stick up for me before, and I had turned on him like a dog.

_I've never done that before. I hated it,_ I thought to myself as I collapsed on our bed once back inside the cabin and in dry clothes. I couldn't believe, though, that Ayden had taken their side.

"Speak of the devil," I whispered to myself as I heard the front door shut. Ayden walked in to our bedroom then, and looked at me in apology.

"I'm sorry you had to do that Bella," he said immediately.

"I deserved it," I sighed, burying my face in the pillow in shame.

"Why Ayden, why are they here living next to us?" I moaned. He sat down next to me and rubbed the small of my back comfortingly.

I could feel him shrug, and then lay down.

"I can't answer that Bella. I'm sorry that they ruined the first night of our vacation," he whispered, wrapping his strong man-arms around me tightly.

"It's not ruined," I said, trying to make him feel better.

"I love you Bella," he said.

"I love you too Ayden. I don't know what I would do if you hadn't have shown up at the time you did. You saved me from myself. I can deal with the Cullen's living next to us for a week. As long as you're by my side, I can do anything."

Ayden exhaled slowly and kissed my forehead. We spent the night holding each other.


	5. Hunting

**Blood Lust**  
**Ch. 5 – Hunting**

**(A/N: Behold…the filler chapter.)**

As much as I hated to admit it, living next to the Cullen's was not so bad! I kind of enjoyed talking to Alice when we passed each other in the mornings. Emmett was still kind of scared of me, Jasper and Rosalie kept their rightful distances, Esme and Carlisle waved and smiled, and Edward didn't even look at me.

Ayden and I spent a lot of time in the hot tub we had found in the backyard. It was kind of cool, having your face and arms freezing cold, but the rest of your body warm and toasty in the water, since the snow fell on you while you relaxed. As a matter of fact, this is exactly where we were when I introduced the idea of hunting tonight.

"How about we go find ourselves some juicy polar bears tonight?" I suggested, waggling my eyebrows.

"Awesome!" he exclaimed.

So after we had gotten out of the hot tub and taken a walk through the snow by the house, we put on our hunting clothes and left the house at twilight.

"Please don't attack me again," I begged Ayden as we ran.

"Bella, that was an accident. I promise it won't ever happen again," Ayden assured me. Last time we had gone hunting, he thought I was a deer and tackled me. It didn't hurt, but it was unnerving how much strength he had.

"Okay, I trust you," I replied, and we held hands as we ran. Running over snow was rather difficult, but running over ice was amazing. If you locked your legs up at just the right time, you could skid right across the surface and it felt like you were flying as you soared through the air.

"Stop," I whispered, so quiet my voice was like the whisper of the wind.

I could see Ayden's bluish silhouette in the midnight moonshine stop beside me.

I inhaled…I could smell them.

The smell of their rich blood intoxicated me. I couldn't help but crouch down into a feral position as I struggled to control my monster reflexes. Tangy venom emanated from my mouth, and I could feel my incisors grow in length and sharpness. The wind picked up then, blowing my hair around my face in frenzy as my eyes turned black as pitch. Slowly, I put one leg forward, then another. I could see it now…the white outline, sharp as a knife, against the black background. A shiver coursed through my spine as I imagined how it would taste.

I knew it could smell me; the huge bear glanced nervously from side to side, struggling to find me in the midnight sun. I froze as it looked over at me, but continued when it saw straight through me. The innocent creature made a deathly mistake; it turned its back to my presence. I ran then, at full speed, closing in on my prey. I was there in an instant, ten yards away. I crept closer…closer…almost there…I could already feel it in my mouth, enjoying my prize before I even touched it, when a black mass shot by me and tackled my trophy.

I snarled wickedly, accepting the challenge, and leaped towards the intruder, landing dead on my target. We slid a short ways on the ice before I realized who it was that I was straddling. His bronze hair undulated in the polar wind, his black eyes glaring up at me.

"You made a mistake," I spat ferociously.

"I agree," Edward hissed back, grabbing me by the shoulders and flipping us over so that he was pinning me to the ground.

From my peripheral vision, I caught sight of the crumpled polar bear's carcass, completely free of blood.

"You stole my kill," I said, my voice hoarse with the disappointment of losing something so close.

"You stole my heart," Edward stated, his eyes fading into their brilliant topaz again as the blood entered his system.

The dull aching in the back of my throat, thirsting for blood, was turning into sharp pains now, my craving indelible. I watched his lips, coated with blood, move as he spoke. It smelled so good…I was reaching up for a taste when I realized what the blood was on.

Edward was simply staring at me, and then licked the blood off of his lips.

"Get off, I'm married!" I yelled now that the blood was gone and the trance was broken. I put my hands on his chest to shove him off.

"He doesn't love you. He's going to hurt you," Edward said, taking my wrists gently off of his shirt and setting them by my side on the snow.

"What are you talking about, of course he loves me! He would never hurt me, ever!" I denied vehemently as he climbed off of me, finally.

I made a show of standing up quickly, brushing myself off roughly, as if scraping mud off my clothes.

"Bella, I'm telling the truth," he pressed, his eyes burning with sincerity.

"Yeah, well the last time you told the truth we both got hurt," I said quietly, the familiar pain of the memories filling my system, much like the blood that filled Edward's.

I turned from him then, and began to walk away. I felt his hand close around my wrist.

"Wait," he said, and I turned my head, fighting to hide the sorrow in my eyes.

"I didn't…I mean…um," Edward began, struggling to find the words.

"I'm sorry," he said, looking at the snowy ground. He released my wrist.

"Me too," I whispered, and fled.

xXxXxXxXxXx

"Did you get your fill?" I asked Ayden back at the cabin. I wasn't much in the mood for high energy activities, so I skipped hunting and went straight back to the cabin. Ayden was just coming in.

"Yeah, it was great. Where'd you get off to?" he asked, not suspecting much.

"I uh…couldn't find any. I went after a deer instead," I told him with a small shrug.

"Oh, okay. What's wrong?" Ayden asked, concerned at my lack of enthusiasm.

"Nothing I'm just…tired," I said.

He raised an eyebrow. "Vampires don't get tired."

"My head hurts?"

"They don't do that either."

"I ran into Edward when I was out there, it's nothing," I explained, hoping he wouldn't press the issue.

"Oh. I'm sorry," he said, sitting down with me.

"Don't worry about it! Tonight's the last night we have the cabin, I guess we should pack our stuff," said I.

"I had some other ideas," Ayden said with a grin.

"I really think we should get packed. It's almost five in the morning and our flight leaves at nine," I told him, making excuses.

Ayden closed his eyes in concentration, bowing his head to the ground. About a minute later, he popped his head back up.

"Done!" he said happily. His ability to lift things with his mind came in handy, but not right now.

"Let's…build a fire," I suggested, folding my arms and curling up on the couch.

"Okay," he mumbled, taking the hint. He pouted as he threw some wood in the fireplace and tossed a match in after it.

He curled up with me, then, on the couch, and we sat for a while.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Ayden asked softly.

I was silent for a thoughtful moment, and then he kissed my lips gently. I found in that sweet gesture the courage to speak up and let him know the truth.

"You remember…that one Christmas all those years ago when we met? You pulled me out of the ocean and I was…well, I was almost dead. It was like I was watching you from the sky, dive in after me and then bite me so carefully. Your skin was glittering so beautifully, and then I couldn't see anymore. But then when I could see, I was on the ground, looking up at you. You kept me there with you and took care of me, and then we ran to Athens and lived there for so long," I began, quietly.

"I never knew that side of the story before," Ayden replied, just as quiet.

I bit my lip and wondered how I was going to say this. He waited patiently for me continue.

"Well, when I fell, or jumped rather, I wasn't cliff diving. In a sense, I suppose I was, but…I didn't mean to be alive after I jumped."

"I don't understand," Ayden whispered, but I had a feeling he did.

"I…I was trying to kill myself, Ayden."

My husband's eyes widened and a crease formed between his eyebrows. I reached up and gently smoothed it with my thumb.

"But then an angel saved me, and I was never more grateful to be alive," I whispered, my throat tightening and preparing for the tears that never came.

Ayden's face was showing some strong emotion, but I couldn't quite place my finger on it.

"Oh Bella," he whispered, burying his face in my hair.

"I could hardly survive after my first love left…I don't know what I would do if you left too."

"I'll never leave," Ayden promised, running his thumb over my cheekbone.

I nodded and reached up to kiss his perfect angel's lips.

What a shame that all of his pretty words were lies.


	6. Happy Birthday

**Blood Lust**  
**Ch. 6 – Happy Birthday**

The flight home wasn't too bad, and sitting next to Edward for almost twenty-four hours wasn't as awkward now that he wasn't being arrogant and I wasn't being a bitch. Sometimes Alice would turn around and talk to me, and I made an honest effort to be happy and make conversation. It came easily, but it was reluctance that made me hold back.

Ayden kept me occupied by quietly reading his book out loud while I leaned back against the seat. The only people that could possibly hear such a low tone would be vampires, and there happened to be seven very attentive ones sitting around me.

Rosalie ignored my presence completely. Not a word, not a smile, not even a fleeting glance. I equaled about as much as the piece of gum stuck on the bottom of her Prada stiletto.

I was so excited to get back home. I knew there would be a huge bouquet of flowers waiting for Ayden that I had to hide somewhere for his birthday, which was tomorrow. I could tell tomorrow was going to be a great Valentines Day – the band was surprising Ayden with a slew of his favorite songs at their weekly performance, and then we were going to take him hunting somewhere undisclosed.

As of late, he hadn't mentioned one single thing about his own birthday tomorrow. Did he forget, or was he going to test me and see if I remembered? Did he even know it was Valentines Day tomorrow? Surely he did. He always did.

The plane hit a bit of turbulence and I glanced out the window; it was a cloudy day and even though I couldn't possibly die in a plane crash, it still made me a little nervous. Ayden picked up on this and gently squeezed my hand, rubbing little circles with his thumb into my palm. I snuck a glance over at Edward, and saw he was staring at Ayden with such ferocity that it scared the hell out of me. I looked away quickly.

_If looks could kill_, I thought to myself.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

"Let's stop by the club real quick to make sure it's still in once piece," I said to Ayden as he drove us through downtown Seattle.

"Good idea," Ayden said, going along unknowingly with my little plan.

Ten minutes later we were rolling up into the parking lot of Blood Lust. It was about noon on Valentines Day; we had to land somewhere in Europe because the plane we were on was not allowed to touch down in America because of the terrible storms happening in Seattle.

I had said nothing to Ayden about his birthday yet, and the butterflies were floating around excitedly in my stomach. It would be several hours before the surprise performance and the hunting trip, but I was already allowing myself to get worked up. He unlocked the door with his key and we walked in.

The place smelled wonderful; a bit floral with small undertones of vanilla. We paid a lot for good air conditioning and expensive air fresheners. Regular clubs smelled of spilled beer and sweat, but not ours. The leather couches were looking brand new and untouched, polished and clean. The fluffy maroon carpet on the floor contrasted beautifully with black satin walls, and the shiny, spotless wooden dance floor gleamed. The stage was set up with instruments and microphones, like it usually was, and all the lights were off. The bar's smooth marble countertop was shiny, and the rows and rows of glasses and bottles of alcohol were lined up on the glass shelving unit behind the counter.

"Home sweet home," I sighed happily as I looked around. Suddenly I got an idea.

"Hey, could you do something for me? Could you go in the back and make sure we have enough…uh, enough cables to hook up the 'mikes and guitars tonight? They've been disappearing lately," I lied.

"Um…sure!" Ayden complied, walking into the back.

The second his back was turned, I dashed off towards the direction of our apartment. I ran as fast as I could, and I made it just in time to sign off for the huge bouquet of roses and carry them inside. It was an immaculate arrangement of black and red roses, surrounded by white baby's breath.

"Ick," I mumbled as I sniffed the baby's breath. It smelled like a ferret.

I put them in the closet that he never looked in, gently threw a blanket over some stacked boxes around it to cover it up without messing it up, shut the door, and ran back to the club.

Just as Ayden was leaving the back room and entering the main room, I closed the door behind me.

"Hey!" I said nonchalantly, leaning against the door.

"Hey yourself," he said back with a smile. He kissed me swiftly and then pulled me out the door.

"Could you do me another favor?" I asked sweetly just as we passed the half-way mark between the club and our home.

"Sure baby!" he agreed.

"I need you to drop me off at Felix's house. I told her I would come over real quick to help her with some wardrobe malfunction. You can go home if you want, she'll give me a ride home," I explained.

"Sounds good with me."

"Excellent," I said, and he turned down Felicity's street.

"Bye sweetheart, see you in a few hours!" I said, blowing him a kiss and waving as I got out of the car.

"Have fun!" he yelled as he drove away.

I ran up the front lawn and nearly broke down Felicity's door; I was so excited to see her again.

"BELLA!" she screamed in pleasure as she saw me through the window.

She flung the door open, and then slammed into me, nearly knocking me over.

"I missed you so much!" my friend yelled as we hugged, saying each word as she jumped up and down.

"Me too! You'll never guess who I saw there," I said.

She released me very quickly and grabbed my shoulders.

"Who?" she hissed in suspense as she dragged me inside.

It was great to retell the tale of meeting my estranged lover and his family on my husband's and my second honeymoon. Her facial expressions were hilarious as I whispered some parts and yelled some others, using my hands to gesticulate fiercely.

"That is something right off the set of Jerry Springer," Felicity said as I collapsed, out of breath, on the couch after it was over.

"You're telling me!" I said with a laugh.

"Where's your lovely husband?" I asked.

"At the club, setting up with Zara's husband," she replied.

"Really? Ayden and I were just there. They weren't there," I told her.

"They just left like…five minutes ago," Felix explained, glancing at the clock on the wall.

"Where's Zara?" I asked, figuring she'd be here with Felix like she usually was.

"She said she was going to run an errand real quick, probably buying Marx some flowers or something. He loves her so much, it's so cute," Felix replied with a grin.

"Oh. Well, it was great seeing you again. I gotta get home to Ayden so I can surprise him with flowers," I said with a small shrug.

"Are we still on for tonight?" she asked.

"Definitely! I can't wait!"

"Me neither," she agreed.

She walked me to the front door, and then added as an after thought, "You want me to give you a ride home?"

"Nah, I'll run," I said.

"Okay, bye!" she waved.

I ran quickly from her house to mine.

_Ayden's gonna be so surprised!_ I thought as I quietly unlocked the front door.

I peeked around the living room and the kitchen; no Ayden.

I snuck into the closet, uncovered the roses, and crept across the hallway to our bedroom. The door was open a crack. I paused a minute to think about my plan.

_Okay, slowly open the door and hand him the flowers._

No, that was a stupid idea.

_Fling the door open and dance in with a rose between your teeth._

That was even dumber!

_Throw the flowers at him?_

Couldn't I be anymore creative?!

I concluded that I should just hand him the flowers and smile real big. That would do the trick.

I held the Australian crystal vase in front of me carefully and I nudged the door open gently with my toe. It swung open noiselessly.

But I never got to give Ayden the flowers.

I couldn't even breathe.

Because what I found ruined me forever.

My eyes opened wide as I watched their lips moving furiously together, locked in a tight embrace. My sister and my husband.

My heart stopped again as I watched Ayden, the love of my life, gently push Zara, my best friend, my sister, down onto my bed. Onto _our_ bed.

My breath caught in my throat as I watched him stroke her face gently as they kissed. His thumb slid down her cheekbone and caressed her cheek as their lips separated momentarily. My husband whispered her name, and then their lips met again.

I thought he saved that for me.

I felt my knees go out, and my hands began to shake violently.

But it was not the shattering of the crystal vase against the hard wooden floor that made the forbidden lovers look up in surprise, caught in the act of their unforgivable acts.

It was the shattering of my heart.

**(A/N: I hate Valentines Day.)**


	7. I Hate You

**Blood Lust**  
**Ch. 7 – I Hate You**

I shook my head and rubbed my eyes, waiting for them to refocus before I could confirm what I saw. And suddenly, as the last bit of blurry shapes slid into clear, precise objects, I knew that it was true. It was unbelievable, yet somehow it fit. It was the last piece of the puzzle that I had unconsciously been putting together. It was unseen, but it was not unknown. Expected, but I was completely blindsided by such selfish actions.

It was when I saw Ayden coming towards me that I realized I had been standing there, staring at them, for several minutes, not really seeing.

"Babe, it's not what you think," Ayden said, his voice almost shaking with fear.

_Tell me about it. _

"Then what is it?" I asked him calmly, looking up into his citrine eyes. They always held his emotions, allowing me to read him like a book when I wanted to. I always thought they were the most beautiful color, so innocent yet so masculine. They were perfect; he was perfect. Now the color reminded me of bile.

He stopped when I answered his question.

"I…it was a mistake," Ayden replied, his voice still fearful. Yet his tone was definite.

"Oh," I said, nodding in mock understanding.

"I've made a few of those before. Once, when I was just a kid, I went looking for a vampire that wanted me dead. Almost died…but then Edward got there just in time. Then, a year later, I let him go. I was never the same since then, you know. Love can't just disappear into thin air. Or at least that was what I thought before," I said, talking with no emotion. It would hurt too much if I tried to feel anything at this point. I was too far gone.

Ayden studied me for a few moments, gauging my reactions I guess. Zara just sat on my bed, smoothing out her shirt slowly, combing the tangles out of her beautiful brown hair, refusing to look in my direction.

"And then, I made the biggest mistake of all," I began again, looking at the blinds that were closed over the big window in my room. I took a breath, gaining my courage, numbing myself. My brown eyes slid over onto his, a crosshair, aiming for the bullet that I was about to deliver.

"I married you," I said simply.

The bullet hit home; Ayden looked winded. His eyes got huge and his breath leaked out in a small 'huhh' sound.

"Bella please…I don't want her. I want you," Ayden begged after he caught his breath.

"If you want _me_, then why the hell can't you keep your hands off of _her_?" I yelled at him, advancing forward a step.

He backed away like a fearful puppy about to be punished by its master. I backed off a little bit, feeling the slow leak of my emotions returning, like the leak of a lethal injection filtering its way through your blood stream.

I held my head in my hands, my breaths growing ragged and short.

"Get out. Both of you. I don't want to see you again," I whispered, sure that they heard me.

"But…where will I go?" Ayden asked helplessly, reminding me of a child.

"To hell, for all I care," I replied heartlessly, raising my head up to look at him. My eyes met his, and he knew I was serious. Dead serious.

"Or maybe you could go move in with Zara, finish your dirty little acts somewhere else. But oh yes, that's right. She has a friggin' HUSBAND!" I said, starting out calmly but screeching the last word.

I looked over at Zara who was still sitting there, staring at the ground. Ayden was opening the closet to get a change of clothes before he left, but I walked over and slammed the door so hard that the wall shook with the force of it.

"Get out of here!" I yelled at him, shoving him towards the door. "You too! Why are you just sitting there? Get out!" I continued to scream, walking over to Zara who got up instantly, running over to Ayden who was shuffling out the door. I followed behind them, and Zara turned around when she got to the porch.

"I'm sorry," Zara said sincerely, looking up at me from underneath her long hair.

"Me too," I said, my voice breaking as more of my emotions returned, all ebbed with fear, loneliness, and an unmistakable throb of pain. "I'm sorry for ever trusting you."

"Don't come back here, either of you. Tell Marx that he's welcome here any time he wants…he'll need a friend just about now because I'll make sure that he hears about this. And don't either of you show your faces at the club again. Why don't you just give me the keys now," I said, my voice quiet and calm, as I laid out the instructions. They listened, guilty prisoners being given their sentences. I held my hand out and they each dropped their key to the club into my hand.

"And the key to the house," I said to Ayden, leaving my open palm out.

He looked pained as he reached into his pocket and gave me the key to our, no, _my_ apartment.

"I'll leave the divorce papers at Zara's house tomorrow around noon. I'm sure you'll be there," I said, an air of finality in my voice.

"Oh Bella," Ayden moaned, rubbing his face with his hands.

"Don't you 'oh Bella' me, Ayden. You made the choice, you pay the price," I said.

"No Bella, you don't understand. I love you! I didn't mean to hurt you!" Ayden said, his foot securely in the door jamb, as if his reason were enough to keep him here.

"Maybe you should have thought about that before you cheated on me," I said, my voice beginning to grow in strength and volume as the anger bubbled up, hot and angry, inside of me.

"It was just a mistake," Ayden argued, pleading with me now.

"So were you," I replied, glaring spitefully at him.

"Don't do this to me Bella, please! I love you!" he exclaimed. Zara stared at him for a moment, and then just walked away.

"Don't do this to you. Don't do this to you. You're not the victim, Ayden! I didn't do anything to deserve this! Nothing! I was always the perfect little housewife, cleaning up your messes when you'd have football parties, going hunting with you, doing all of your laundry, getting you places on time…I was willing to do it Ayden because I loved you! _That_…that is love, Ayden. Cheating is _not_," I said, my arms folding.

He stared at me, his eyes still pleading fiercely, and then he opened his mouth to speak. I held up a finger and said, "Oh wait, you need some clothes, don't you? Don't worry, I'll get 'em for you." I slammed the door in his face and locked it, turning around to go back to the bedroom. I could hear him shuffle down the stairs outside and I pulled a box out of the closet. I tossed as many clothes as I could fit inside of it, and then dragged it across the living room. I reached for the doorknob, but settled for the window latch instead.

"Catch!" I called down to him in mock playfulness as I began to throw all of his clothes, one at a time, out the window.

"Bella! Come on, let's be reasonable!" he called up to me, picking his clothes off the ground, the stairs, the shrubs…they rained down everywhere, and the other people living in the apartments around us began to poke their heads out the door to see what all the commotion was about.

"'Reasonable' was _before_ I walked in on my husband and my best friend!" I yelled calmly down at him, watching him run around like a chicken with its head cut off down in the yard.

"Ooh, burn!" one of the neighbors said from his window, cackling as he watched the scene we were causing.

"Oh shut _up_, you sound like a kid!" I replied to him, rolling my eyes angrily.

I walked back into the bedroom again to load up on some more stuff. It was the last one, however, and I took my time as I lazily dropped each of his possessions out of our…out of _my_ second-story apartment window. He continued to just walk around, catching everything and piling it next to his car.

I flung the box after him, and had my hands on the latch of the window, about to slam it down, but the light from the streetlight outside made the Tiffany's diamond on my left finger glitter.

"Here," I added to him, yanking the wedding ring off of my finger. "You can have this back too." I threw it at him, and he was so surprised to see the token of our love flying through the air at him that it bounced off his forehead.

"Bella! Bella no, please!" he exclaimed, picking it off the ground and holding it up in the air, as if offering it to me.

I closed the window and opened the door, walking slowly down the stairs.

"Okay Ayden…I'm sorry I yelled at you. Cheating with my best friend isn't that big a deal, really. We can work around it," I said to him, my voice full of sympathy and forgiveness. I reached out for the ring and he looked like he had won the lottery.

"Really, babe? You mean it?" he asked hopefully, relief spreading across his face.

"Hell no! What, do you think I'm on crack or something?" I said to him as I took the ring out of his hand. "But this may be worth some money. I've been thinking about buying some new drapes…," I added with a small shrug, walking back up the stairs. I slammed the door behind me, not nearly as hard as I wanted to; I needed it in one piece.

As soon as I was positive that Ayden had gotten in his car and drove away, nearly an hour later, I collapsed onto the couch. The pain of betrayal and the slow burn of hate and anger made my body throb in pain. "Oh God," I moaned, covering my face with my hands.

What was _wrong_ with me? Why does everything have to _always_ go wrong? Why can't I hang onto anything good?

I desperately wished that my tear ducts still worked, because I missed crying the most. It was such an easy way to let it all out, and I haven't been able to in many years.

I glared up at the ceiling. "Why do you hate me so much?" I asked whatever was up there in the clouds, the leader of wherever humans go after they die. I had so willingly given the chance to die, to feel, to _be_, up to Ayden when we first met. From the second he sunk his teeth into my neck; I knew that I would love to be immortal, being able to be with who I loved forever. Now, I regretted the decision with a passion. "Why can't I do anything right?" I yelled in frustration, flinging myself off the couch.

I stalked into the bedroom, staring in disgust at the bed that Ayden and I had shared. Using all the strength that was left in my body, I ripped the sheets off of the mattress and flung them away, watching in satisfaction as they hit the wall and fluttered down in a heap of fabric.

I grabbed the picture of me and Ayden off of the nightstand next to the alarm clock, studying our happy faces. I couldn't stand to look at him, so I threw the frame at the wall, the shattering of the glass and the splintering of the wood helping to relieve some of the pain I was feeling. I yanked the drawers out of the armoire, smashing them against the wall. I threw a punch at the mirror, the glass flying out in tiny shards everywhere. I ran into the bathroom and did away with that mirror also, then slammed my fists through the glass shower door, feeling my soul being ripped to shreds as I destroyed almost everything in my home, wrecking the furniture as I slammed it against the wall, destroying everything that might hold any memory of the cheating bastard.

"I hate you!" I screamed when the house was naught but splintered memories and shattered dreams. I held my head in my hands as I collapsed to the floor in a heap, breathing hard as hate consumed every atom of my being. I know that I hated Ayden, and I sure as hell hated Zara, but I knew that everything that had caused my anger in the first place was _my_ fault.

_I _had trusted. _I_ had failed myself by opening up again. _I _got hurt.

"I hate you," I said again, my voice soft as silent, fruitless sobs engulfed my body. But I wasn't talking about Zara, or Ayden, or anybody else…I was talking about myself.

**(A/N: Gosh, I'm so sorry! This has been so long delayed. I just don't have any inspiration for writing anymore. Everyone's reviews have been so nice and I received so many telling me to continue, which is why I managed to get this chapter out. Thanks to Nadia and Jenny for all the support at school! And NO I will not discontinue this story, there is so much more to tell! If you like this one, check out my other story, **_**Going Under**_**. I need an update for that one too…review like crazy, lovely readers!)**


	8. Everybody's Fool

**Blood Lust**  
**Ch. 8 – Everybody's Fool**

**Disclaimer: Don't own it…**

A small sigh escaped my lips as I stared up at the ceiling. It would be my tenth sigh this hour, the sixteenth hour of the day, the fifth day of the week, the third day that I had been laying here, broken, in the wreckage of my old apartment. I imagined that I looked like death warmed over, clothes wrinkled and my hair in a state of disarray.

"Oh God," I moaned, moving finally, to cover my face with my hands. I rubbed my eyes and pulled myself up into a sitting position, my muscles actually slightly sore from behind in the same position for over seventy two hours. Had it really been that long since I had caught my husband chea—NO, I thought fiercely, holding my head between my hands. It hurt too badly to think about, so I wouldn't. I couldn't. How could I?

I picked myself up, feeling unsteady on my feet. Dragging myself across the room, pulling my feet through the splinters of wood, shreds of fabric, and shards of broken glass, I managed to get to the door and I pulled it open. A beam of moonlight poured through the crack in the door, filtering down from the sky and onto my body.

"Hello," I said softly to it, my voice sounding weird in my ears. I knew that it wouldn't answer, even in my state of temporary insanity, so I kept moving, closing the door softly behind me and then descending the stairs that led up to the second-story. Once I reached the ground, I walked barefoot across the parking lot, the uneven stones sending strange sensations through my feet.

I probably looked like a zombie, shuffling across the parking lot like that. I had no idea where I was going. My sense of direction seemed to fail me because everything looked unfamiliar. But before I knew it, I was raising my hand to knock on the wooden door of a house. I didn't know whose it was, but I knew it was the right place to be. My knuckles made contact with the door three times, then they dropped lifelessly to my side and I waited for the owner of the house to answer.

The door opened slowly, a beam of light from inside causing me to squint away.

"Oh Bella," a voice said, and a pair of arms wrapped around me. It was a familiar sound, a familiar touch.

"Bells, honey, I'm so, so, so sorry," the girl said, releasing me from the hug and pulling me gently into the house, guiding me over to the couch where a man was sitting.

"Bella…," he said, getting up to help support me. He sat me down next to him on the couch, and the girl sat on the other side of me.

I blinked several times, my vision fuzzy, and then their faces slid into focus.

"We heard what happened, Bells," Felicity said gently, holding my hand tightly in her own.

"Yeah, Zara came by here looking for us to buy her sob story. We told her to hit the road. Marx is here too, he was pretty upset about everything. As for Ayden…we haven't seen him in a while," Donny explained, an apologetic expression on his face.

"I can't believe…I mean, I had no idea," I said softly, staring at the carpet as I spoke.

"I mean, I knew that something was up, but I never thought it would be _this_," I added, shaking my head. "I don't know what I did to deserve this. I thought I was a pretty good wife, for however short of a time I actually was," I said, devastation, abandonment, and helplessness coloring my voice.

"Bella, you didn't do anything to deserve this. They played us all, especially you and Marx," Felicity said, biting her lip.

Donny nodded in agreement. "Yeah, they sure the hell did. And don't worry Bells; you never have to see either of them again. I'll make sure of that," he said, being my protector as always.

"Well, whatever happens, he'll be sorry," I said, nodding my head to reassure myself. "He's going to pay for what he did to me…to us. I already told them both that they're not welcome at the club anymore," I added, digging their keys out of my pockets and tossing them to Donny. "I guess I'd better get a lawyer tomorrow. There's no telling how Ayden is going to handle the d-…div-…," I said, trying to be brave and just say the damned word, but no such luck. My throat seemed to close around the word and keep it trapped inside of me.

"Don't think about that right now, okay? Let's think about the next show, alright? What kind of clothes do you want to wear for this next one?" Felix asked, trying desperately to make me feel better, but it just didn't work.

"I don't know, Fee…I guess we should go shopping or something," I replied, my spirits lifting slightly at the idea.

"I'll need new clothes anyway, I don't have any left," I added, and they threw me confusing looks.

I opened my mouth to explain, but they both just held up their hands and shook their heads. "Don't worry about it Bells, we understand," Donny said with a laugh.

I wanted to smile at his joke and laugh along with him. I was trying so _hard_ to get the stupid emotion to reach my face, because life always felt better when you could just smile. But I couldn't. My lips were sealed together with an invisible glue made of pain and regret, the corners of my mouth seemed to be stuck in a permanent upside-down 'u'. I caught the sad face of Felicity looking at me, and I knew she could feel my pain. I was glad for it, because it seemed that she was sharing the burden.

The three of us looked up towards the stairs as we heard a light footstep, and we saw Marx venturing downstairs, braving the outside world. I could feel his pain; it seemed to be radiating from his body. He was a broken man, I knew.

"Thought I heard you down here, Bella. It's nice to hear your voice," Marx said, his voice quiet, as he strained to keep the pain from out of his voice.

"Thanks Marx. How are you?" I asked him, standing up but feeling shaky. He took in my appearance; rumpled clothes, tousled hair, black makeup smudged a bit around my eyes, and I took in his; tie around his neck halfway undone and wrinkled, his usually ironed business casual outfit messy, and I could see the sparkles of tiny shards of broken glass sprinkled on his pants.

"Been better," he said, rubbing the three days worth of stubble on his chin with a sigh.

"We'll get through this, Marx. I know it sounds impossible right now, but…you'll stop hurting after a while. I promise," I told him, watching him carefully.

He looked like he might cry for a moment, though I knew it was impossible. He shook his head and balled his hands into fists for a moment, anger replacing his sadness.

"I just…I don't think I'll ever get over this. How can I? She was my wife. I loved her so much, and then to find out that she was…I can't do it Bella. I just can't accept it," he said, anger evident in his voice.

I didn't know what to say. I just stood there and listened to him talk, getting all of his anger out. It took about fifteen minutes, but finally he seemed exhausted of things to say.

"I need to go," he said suddenly, standing up abruptly. He strode towards the door, a determined look on his face.

"Where are you going, Marx?" I asked, worried for his well-being.

"I don't know Bella. I really don't. But I just can't stay here around everything that reminds me of _her_," he said, opening the door and stepping outside. He kept a hand on the doorknob, however, and turned around to look at me.

I wasn't going to be the one to stop him. He was a broken man. He needed whatever closure he could get, so that maybe, one day, he could move on.

"Don't do anything rash, Marx. Be careful, please," I told him, emphasizing the last word.

"I won't do anything that's undeserved Bella. That's all I can promise," he said.

Little did I know that those would be the last words I would ever hear from Marx, my band member, and my friend.


	9. The Little Things Give You Away

**Blood Lust  
****Ch. 9 – The Little Things Give You Away**

"He did _what_?" I spluttered, staring at Donny as if were insane.

"He went to the Volturi…Marx…he's…he's dead," Donny said sadly.

If vampires could cry, we all would be at this point. All of us, as in myself, Donny, and Felicity. We were sitting in Donny and Felix's living room, staring at our hands that were neatly folded in our laps, except Donny was pacing in front of us.

"But why? Why would he do such a thing?" I breathed, the amount of pain radiating through my dead heart and soul was barely enough to live through, if you would call this living anyway.

"He was a broken man, Bella. His wife left him for another man. He's been alive for a hundred years anyway, he probably felt like it was time," Donny replied softly, sighing.

"Oh," I replied, biting my lip, brow furrowed, trying not to think, though the million things running through my mind at that point made it impossible not to.

"I guess…he's not in pain anymore," Felix managed to say, always trying to find the bright side of things.

"No…wherever he is," I sighed, unclasping my hands and leaning back into the couch, bringing my knees up to my chin.

"I hate Zara," Donny mumbled, rubbing his eyes.

"We all do," I assured him, standing up off the couch. I swayed unsteadily, unsure if I could stand up at this point, though I forced myself to walk the few steps over to Donny and hug him. He seemed hesitant to return the hug, as if outside contact was foreign and strange, though he did hug me back and I pulled away with a sigh.

"We'll get through this…we still have each other, and we're not going anywhere," Felix said, standing up also.

"Right?" she added, second guessing herself.

"Right," Donny and I replied in unison.

"What are we going to tell the people at the club?" I asked, thinking out loud.

"We tell them that Ayden and Zara were caught red handed. Marx turned in his resignation and left the band. He moved overseas to start a new life," Felix voiced after a while of thinking.

"That sounds believable…I guess there isn't much more we can do than that. We can still play…we might need to find r-repla…," I said, but I couldn't say the word. There was no way we could replace Marx…he was an amazing friend, and an amazing band member and musician.

"There's no need to find replacements, Bella. We have drums, bass, and guitar…we can get stand-ins, if we need keyboard or something," Felix said.

Donny and I nodded our approval, staring at the ground.

"Okay then…we can get past this," she added, though if she could cry she'd probably be sobbing. Her breaths were short and ragged, and she sighed as Donny wrapped his arms around his wife.

"I need to go for a walk…I promise I'll come back," I told them; the sadness in the room was enough to kill a person.

The two nodded, Felix's face buried in Donny's chest, Donny looking over at me. I wished that Ayden was here to hold me like that…the feeling of abandonment and loneliness inside of me was crippling.

I opened the front door and stepped out of the house into the cool autumn night. Three months had passed since Ayden and Zara's betrayal. As I turned off the block, I couldn't help but think that we all three knew that Marx's end was coming sooner and sooner. I had never seen a man look as broken as he had. He trusted very easily, and had been hurt many times in his life. At least he was out of his misery…or that's what I hoped.

"I'm so sorry Marx," I said out loud, staring up at the bright moonlight.

"He'd forgive you, even though it isn't your fault," said a voice from behind me, smooth as crystal and soft as velvet, warm as the brilliant topaz burning in his gaze even though I didn't turn to meet his eyes.

"What are you doing here, Edward?" I asked softly, my emotions too preoccupied with sadness to feel anger.

"I wanted to see you…I missed you," Edward replied, honesty in his voice.

I smiled bitterly, keeping my gaze on the sidewalk. I hadn't looked at him since the trip with Ayden, and I didn't want to put a mark on my record though my heart desperately wanted to.

"I'm sorry about what happened…you know, with Ayden. I wish I could have told you before it happened," he sighed, falling into step beside me.

"Why didn't you?" I asked.

"You wouldn't have believed me. Alice…she saw the whole thing before it happened, and I knew what was on Ayden's mind. Every time I saw him with you, I wanted to kill him. How could he think of another woman when you were right there? He had everything that I would die for and he just gave it away," he said softly, shaking his head slowly.

"I never saw it coming," I admitted. My voice was strangled by the sudden urge to scream and cry, throw myself on the ground and flail my fists like I was three. I resisted, however, and settled with jamming my hands in my pockets.

We walked in silence, comfortable and never awkward, trying to get used to each other's company. When he finally broke the silence, I looked up at him. His beauty and the sense of innocence and safety I felt when I was with him was nothing like I remembered, and I actually had to think about why I could ever be angry with him. His next words reminded me, however.

"I am responsible for all of your heartache Bella. It's my fault…I let you go. I pushed you away from me and my family. I let you walk away when I never should have let go of your hand. I'll never be able to put into words how truly sorry I am," Edward said, the topaz in his eyes melting into those golden pools I could easily have spent forever in, never unhappy and perfectly content.

"It's…," I began, trying to find the right words. "I don't know what it is, Edward. I really don't," I sighed. "I'm over Ayden. I hardly think about him anymore anyways. You don't have to apologize, I'll be okay," I lied.

Edward smiled sadly. "You're a terrible liar Bella," he said, looking down at me, the sad smile on his perfect features making my stomach flutter slightly. "The little things give you away."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, frozen inside of his golden gaze.

"It means…I can tell that you're not over Ayden. Your hands are in your pockets…your shoulders are slumped…the sadness in your eyes," he said softly, reaching out and gently running a soft thumb over my cheekbone.

I reached up and gently lay my hand over his hand, pressing it against my cheek.

"I'm not over you either," I whispered, closing my eyes and holding his hand to my face. "Even after all these years, all of those miles between us…you were never too far," I sighed, pressing my lips to his hand before letting it go.

He held his hand there for a moment, softly stroking my cheekbone with his thumb.

I turned and began to walk away from him, each step harder than the last.

"I never stopped loving you, Isabella Swan," Edward called after me, his hand still outstretched.

I stopped and glanced over my shoulder, a small, sad smile on my face.

"I'll always love you Edward," I said softly, though I was sure that he heard me.

I began walking again, walking away from my first and only true love. Everything with Ayden seemed so superficial to me now. I threw my heart into my relationship with him, and he broke it in return. I couldn't ever forgive Ayden for what he did to me.

What I had with Edward was different. I gave my heart, my soul, my entire being to Edward. I gave him my life, and he had completely broken me, turned my world upside down, stomped on my everything and sent me into a state of nothingness for years and years. But what made no sense to me was how easily I could forgive him. How I could forgive the man who wrecked and ruined me. How I could forgive the man that never meant to hurt me, yet he had, immeasurably so.

It never would have worked with Ayden because in my mind, I was with Edward. Edward kept everything of me that I had given him, and I realized that he still had it. I never could have loved Ayden. I had nothing to love him with. Edward had my heart and my soul, and he had absolutely no intention of giving them back.

And the funny thing?

How I realized, right then and there, that Edward Cullen was meant to have my everything…and I was okay with that.


	10. Hello's and Goodbye's

**Blood Lust**

**Ch. 10 – Hello's and Goodbye's**

We held a funeral for Marx. It was a simple ceremony, no wordy Baptist preacher or reception hall afterwards. We dressed in black, Donny built a sort of memorial cross for Marx and we buried the cross in the backyard of our house. (I had been living with Felicity and Donny since Ayden and I had broken up.) We leaned on each other and cried tearlessly as we dropped red roses on top of the makeshift grave, and then we went on a memorial hunt. Deer was always his favorite, so that's all we hunted. I missed my friend terribly, and I know that the others did too.

Later that night, I sat alone on the seat beneath the bay window in the back of the house, hugging my knees and staring out into the bright moonlight. A week ago today I had spoken with Edward. He hadn't left my mind since. It was hard to focus on anything that I had been doing, seeing as I only wanted to think about one thing continuously.

I wondered if he was thinking about me. I could never be sure, and I probably would never know. I missed him so much, but I couldn't help but think that if we tried to recover what we had lost so long ago it would only end in pain for the both of us.

Felix came into the living room before long, and sat opposite me on the window seat. We stared out the window together in silence for a while, before she said the one thing that I, for some reason unknown to me, had been dreading.

"The club has been closed for almost four months," she said, not taking her eyes off of the wooded area about a hundred feet away from where we sat.

"And?" I asked, obviously not wanting to talk about this right now.

"And I think that we should get back to work. I miss performing…I miss being on stage. I miss the crowds, the dancers, the excitement of the nightlife," Felix replied, sighing slightly as she thought about it.

I was silent as I, too, thought about it. I thought about it often, though none of us brought it up. I did miss it, even though I didn't admit it.

"Bells, I know you miss it too. How could you not? They loved us. No doubt we'd have an awesome grand opening too. The place would be packed," she continued, looking away from the outside world, her gaze falling on me.

"I do miss it Felix. I just don't think it'd feel right to go back. First there were six, and now there are three. There's no way we'd be as good as before," I said, shaking my head as I looked at her too.

"We'll never know until we try. We don't have to go crazy or anything…it could just be a little performance to start out with, you know what I mean? Three or four songs max. We could all pick them out together, too. Marx would never have wanted us to quit. He liked being on stage more than I did, and you know how much I like getting up in front of everybody," she said, smiling slightly.

I smiled too as she smiled, glad for the relief that she provided me. I sighed softly, stretching my legs out beside her.

"I guess one performance couldn't hurt. We could use the extra cash too. Have you talked to Donny about this yet?" I asked.

"Yes she has. We've just been waiting for you, Bells. We didn't want to make you uncomfortable or anything. And now that you're okay with it, we should get planning," Donny said as he entered the living room from the stairs.

"I should have known," I said with a grin, rolling my eyes.

"I have a few songs in mind that we should definitely think about doing…," Felix began, and I found myself caught up in the rip tide of planning a new show with only three of us, and the truth is…I couldn't be more excited about it.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

Standing on the stage was very surreal to me. It was different, seeing as it was only me, Felix, and Donny, yet it was very much the same, seeing as I was on the same stage, with the same instruments, in the same building. Everything in part belonged to me, yet it was so alien. I glanced down at my outfit; a simple black strapless dress that hugged my curves and stopped a few inches above my knees. My hair was arranged in soft curls, my light brown eyes standing out in contrast with the smoky eye makeup, my feet adorned in bright red Jimmy Choo's.

I gripped the microphone and swallowed back a wave of fear that overtook me as I stepped out from the shadows into the spotlight, staring at the faces in the crowd, looking right through them. They all had a story, with highs and lows throughout their lives. Their stories would remain secrets to me, all of theirs, but tonight I would share mine with them.

"How are we doing tonight?" I said into the microphone, my voice sounding scared and shaky.

The crowd mumbled their appropriate responses, obviously not prepared to see the lively, vivacious Bella they were all so used to looking so…sad. Felix and Donny came out a few seconds later to give me support, and I smiled slightly in thanks. Donny wore black jeans and a black button-up shirt with a bright red tie. Felicity looked stunning in a black long-sleeved cocktail dress with a wide bright red belt around her tiny waist.

"We have some unfortunate news to share with you," Donny said into his microphone.

Some members of the crowd looked annoyed, others very concerned. I wondered if my six biggest most supportive fans would be in that crowd tonight, listening to me talk like this. Alice, Jasper, Edward, Esme, Carlisle, and Emmett actually sounded comforting, especially one.

"You're probably wondering where the rest of the band is…," Felicity said, a pained look in her eye.

"The truth is…it's only us left. Ayden, our second lead vocals and my husband, was caught cheating with Zara, keyboardist and Marx's wife," I told them, my voice growing stronger slightly as Felicity slipped her arm around my waist and Donny gripped my hand.

The crowd was angry, yelling curses and horrible things about Ayden and Zara, and it seemed to me like they, too, felt betrayed by their actions. It was good to know that we had so many people backing up our decision to kick them the hell out of our lives after the way they turned our worlds upside down.

"Marx, our bassist, left the band to start a new life somewhere overseas," I finished, taking a cleansing breath as the words left my soul. They sounded believable, as the crowd took them and believed them, their faces ranging from apologetic to angry. It was silent in that room full of hundreds of people, everyone turning to face me and my best friends.

"We're going to play for you tonight. We've missed entertaining you guys, and we apologize for the months of break that we took," Donny finished up.

We all turned around and walked into the center of the stage, snapping our microphones into their respective holders. Donny went to the back of the stage and took his seat behind his giant drum kit. Felix picked up Marx's bass guitar and put the strap around her shoulders. I'm sure it felt like a right of passage for her as she stood in front of the microphone where Marx should have been, prepared to play his part and her own at the same time. I took my electric guitar and met Felix up at the front of the stage, standing in front of my microphone, half-prepared and half feeling like a deer caught in the headlights of an eighteen wheeler.

**(A/N: the songs listed below are all in my profile, at the very bottom of the page. I ask that you listen to them as you read, so you get more out of this part of the story.)**

Strumming the first few notes of the song felt odd, but I gained courage from the beat of Donny's drum as his melody joined mine. Our first piece, 'Who Knew' by Pink, was chosen by me, obviously in light of Ayden's leaving, but I had someone else in my thoughts as I sang it.

_You took my hand, you showed me how  
__You promised me you'd be around  
__A huh, that's right_

_I took your words, and I believed  
__In everything you said to me  
__Yeah huh, that's right_

_If someone said three years from now, you'd be long gone  
__I'd stand up and punch them out  
__Cause they're all wrong  
__I know better  
__Cause you said forever  
__And ever  
__Who knew?_

_Remember when we were such fools, and so convinced, and just too cool  
__Oh no, no no  
__I wish I touch you again  
__I wish I could still call you friend  
__I'd give anything_

_When someone said count your blessings now 'fore they're long gone  
__I guess I just didn't know how  
__I was all wrong  
__They knew better  
__Still you said forever  
__And ever  
__Who knew?_

_I'll keep you locked in my head  
__Until we meet again  
__Until we, until we meet again  
__But I won't forget you my friend  
__What happened?_

_If someone said three years from now, you'd be long gone  
__I'd stand up and punch them out  
__Cause they're all wrong  
__And that last kiss, I'll cherish  
__Until we meet again  
__And time makes it harder, I wish I could remember  
__But I keep your memory  
__You visit me in my sleep  
__My darling  
__Who knew?  
__My darling, my darling, who knew?  
__My darling, I miss you, my darling, who knew?_

The people in the crowd were dancing, some of them, though they seemed to take on some of our feelings as we all three poured them out for them to hear. Now that we had put ourselves out there to them, we figured we'd play a song that they could all relate to. 'Everybody's Fool' by Evanescence was next.

_Perfect by nature  
__Icons of self indulgence  
__Just what we all need  
__More lies about a world…_

_That never was and never will be  
__Have you no shame don't you see me?  
__You know you've got everybody fooled_

_Look, here she comes now  
__Bow down and stare in wonder  
__Oh, how we love you  
__No flaws when you're pretending  
__But now I know she…_

_Never was and never will be  
__You don't know how you betrayed me  
__And somehow you've got everybody fooled_

_Without the mask  
__Where will you hide?  
__Can't find yourself  
__Lost in your lies_

_I know the truth now  
__I know who you are  
__And I don't love you anymore_

_It never was and never will be  
__You don't know how you betrayed me  
__And somehow you've got everybody fooled_

_It never was and never will be  
__You're not real and you can't save me  
__And somehow now you're everybody's fool_

'Closing Time' by Semisonic was our final piece. We all settled on this song for some reason, as it gave us an odd sense of closure for all three of our missing friends, two enemies now. It was like a strange goodbye, and singing it made it so much easier to help with letting go.

_Closing time  
__Open all the doors and let you out into the world  
__Closing time  
__Turn all of the lights on over every boy and every girl  
__Closing time  
__One last call for alcohol so finish your whiskey or beer  
__Closing time  
__You don't have to go home but you can't stay here_

_I know who I want to take me home  
__I know who I want to take me home  
__I know who I want to take me home  
__Take me home_

_Closing time  
__Time for you to go out to the places you will be from  
__Closing time  
__This room won't be open till your brothers or your sisters come  
__So gather up your jackets  
__Move into the exits  
__I hope you have found a friend  
__Closing time  
__Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end_

_Yeah  
__I know who I want to take me home  
__I know who I want to take me home  
__I know who I want to take me home  
__Take me home_

_Closing time  
__Time for you to go out to the places you will be from_

_I know who I want to take me home  
__I know who I want to take me home  
__I know who I want to take me home  
__Take me home_

_I know who I want to take me home  
__I know who I want to take me home  
__I know who I want to take me home  
__Take me home_

_Closing time  
__Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end_

I smiled as the last chord rang out from my guitar, and I could feel the smiles from Donny and Felix right beside me.

"Thank you, have a good night," I said into the microphone. The lights over the stage turned off, and the DJ took over for us. As we put our instruments away and such, we were quiet, our minds so full of things that it seemed impossible to talk. This feeling lasted for only a few seconds, however, and soon we were all gathered in the back hugging.

"I feel so much better," Donny said, shaking his head.

"I know…that was so strange. I don't think we meant to say goodbye when we first got out there, but we did," I added.

"And it felt great," Felix finished for me.

I smiled at my friends and instead of going out to join the party we stayed by ourselves for a while in the back. We trickled out slowly, one by one, into the crowd that we had drawn to our club. Donny and Felix were dancing happily together, and I stood, alone, watching them with a slight smile on my face.

I was happy for the first time in what seemed like forever.


	11. Us

**Blood Lust**

**Ch. 11 – Us**

**(A/N: I think I gave off the wrong vibe in the last chapter…the club is not closing! The type of closure I was talking about was directed towards Ayden and Bella, not Blood Lust.)**

"That was amazing Bella," said a voice behind me.

I turned and looked up into the face of the speaker. I smiled slightly as our eyes met, his familiar topaz gems making my breathing unsteady.

"Thank you Edward, that means a lot to me," I replied, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear.

"Of course, I don't believe anyone would expect anything less than amazing from you," he added, one corner of his mouth pulling up into a smile.

I smiled bashfully and glanced down at the floor for a moment before bringing my eyes back up to him.

"What are you doing here Edward?" I asked him, not trying to sound rude, just curious.

"I came to see you, actually. I've been distracted since we've last spoken…I missed you terribly," he told me.

_Me too_, I wanted to say, but I held my tongue.

"I feel that we might have something going for us," he added, his smile growing into a boyish grin.

"Us?" I asked, surprised.

"Yes…us," he replied.

"Define 'us'," I pressed, cocking an eyebrow.

"Oh, you know…us," he said, shrugging his shoulders.

"No, I don't know 'us'," I told him, slightly exasperated.

"You and me, me and you…us…together," Edward said, his eyebrows raised a fraction of a centimeter expectantly.

"Oh! That…us. Oh. Well…uh…," I stammered, racking my brain for some kind of answer that would make sense.

"You say 'oh' like it's a bad thing," he said, frowning slightly.

"Well, yes, it is a bad thing. I mean…we had our chance. Two chances, actually…every time we were an 'us' it ended…badly," I explained, my eyebrows knitting themselves together in a worry line above my eyes.

"Oh," he breathed, sighing, looking very sad.

"I thought…maybe…we could give it another shot, Bella. I miss you. I-I love you. I want to be with you, Bella, I…I really do," he said, looking at me, his eyes full of the pain that came with years of aloneness and solitude.

I closed my eyes, trying to hide the same feelings that I had, the same pain and misery that I had felt while away from him for so long.

"Please…," I said, my voice full of emotion. "Don't do this Edward. Not now…not after such a great show and a great conversation the other day…I can't do this," I told him, shaking my head and opening my eyes again.

He tilted his head very slightly to the side, staring deep into my eyes. He could see my soul through them, I knew, and exactly what I was feeling. I wanted to believe what he said, so, so badly. I wanted him; I wanted to love him and to be loved by him. I wanted to hug him and kiss him and run my hands through his hair…but I knew that such reckless actions would be the start of something. What that something was, I didn't know. But I knew that something would end up in more pain for the both of us, exactly as it had the last two times.

Edward looked at me, and I at him. He straightened his posture and cleared his throat, nodding once. In that simple nod, I knew that he knew what I wanted. And I knew that he wanted the same thing. But that one little four-letter word kept us apart; fear. I was afraid to be hurt, and he was afraid of the same thing.

His gaze moved down slowly from my eyes to my lips. He studied them for the shortest second, and then returned his eyes to mine. He stepped closer to me, closing the distance between us, and reached out, gently holding onto my forearm. He bent down and pressed his lips to mine ever so softly. He pulled away much too soon, his eyes soft. "Us," he whispered, releasing me.

Before any of this registered, he was gone, leaving me with a word and a kiss, a million mixed feelings and thoughts running through my mind. I looked down, and smiled as I saw the rose in my hand, my pale fingers gently holding the green stem, the blood red petals cascading around the center of the flower.

I lifted it to my nose and smelled it gently, the delicate scent reminding me of him. He had done it again. Blindsided me with a kiss and now I was hooked.

Us?

Maybe.


	12. Never Enough

**Blood Lust**

**Ch. 12 – Never Enough**

"Bella…you've been staring at the flower for an hour. Where did it come from?" Felix pressed, trying to get me to talk.

Since Edward had surprised me with the flower and the kiss at the club, I'd sank into a comatose-like state, fully aware of my surroundings, though I chose to ignore them and focus on the thoughts inside my head.

What if there _could be_ an 'us'? Would we fall in love again? Would we get married? Would we run away together? _If_ I said yes…if we both mutually agreed to give 'us' another go, would it work this time? But the biggest factor in this was a very small two letter word...'if'.

"Come on Bella, just talk to us!" Donny exclaimed, taking me by the shoulders and giving me a good shake, gentle yet firm enough to tear my gaze away from the rose, the only physical proof of the possibility of 'us', and looked up at him.

"Fee, she's looking at me now! Hurry up and ask the question again!" Donny said hurriedly to Felicity, who rushed over and knocked him out of the way.

"Bella. Who gave you the damn flower?" she said firmly.

She took my shoulders and looked into my eyes. A tiny smile crept onto my features, and she must have seen _something_ in my eyes, for she started squealing and jumping up and down, letting go of me to clap her hands over her mouth.

"I feel so out of the loop!" Donny said in frustration, throwing his hands hopelessly into the air.

"_He_ gave it to me," I said simply, twirling the rose in my fingers.

"He? Who the heck is…ohhh," he replied, smacking his forehead.

"Edward!!!" Felix exclaimed, extremely happy for me.

"Yes…Edward gave me the flower," I confirmed, and Donny grinned.

"Calm yourself Fee…we don't want another scene like last time," Donny said to his wife, and she responded by stopping the jumping and settled with a huge grin on her beautiful features.

"So what does this mean?" Felix asked me, her eyebrows raised slightly.

"I…I don't know," I said honestly.

"It's pretty clear what he wants, but I don't know if I do," I continued, looking at the flower again.

My spell broken, I sat down on the couch and sighed heavily, biting my lip lightly as I tried to think of a pro/con list. He had that way of dazzling me, definitely. Maybe this is why I had felt so…gone whenever he kissed me. Or maybe it was because I really wanted it. Every one of my thoughts seemed so muddled together. It was so very weird the way I felt at this point. Like I was torn between something that I wanted, and something that I didn't. I shook my head to clear my thoughts and looked up at Felix and Donny, who were watching me expectantly.

"I'm fine. I'm just gonna go to my room," I said, and disappeared upstairs.

I collapsed onto my couch, stretching out and staring at the ceiling.

Why would Edward want me so bad? I'm broken. My husband left me for another woman. He's my ex boyfriend…and now he wants me back. It seemed to me like I was some kind of filth that would just mar his beautiful image. Even though it was all his fault that I ended up this way. If he had just stopped trying to be so damn careful in the beginning and hadn't have left, then I never would have had to go through this entire Ayden thing since everything that I wanted was right there.

I never would have had to go through the years and years of pain, yearning for a way out but never finding one. If it weren't for Edward, I'd be a normal woman in her mid 40's with a husband, a houseful of kids and grandkids. I wouldn't be a heartbroken girl, barely eighteen, living with her best friend's, owner of a vampire nightclub. Hell, I wouldn't even know that vampires exist!

I have no idea what I'm going to do about Edward.

One half of my heart wants him…his amazing personality, his serious side, his everything. The other half of my heart wants to run away screaming in fear of getting hurt again. If I were to get hurt, I don't think I would live through it. Not after everything that's already happened to me. But no matter how hard I tried to deny it, the half that he stole from me long ago felt like I had been reacquainted with it, like I had been searching so hard for so long and I finally, finally found what I was looking for, though somewhere along the way I had forgotten what I was in search of.

Sighing deeply to clear my racing thoughts, I massaged my temples gently and stared at the dark ceiling as if it were going to give me the answers to all of the questions berating my poor brain. When it yielded nothing, I closed my eyes and laid my head back against the wall, muttering something about the injustice that Edward already had his mind made up and I was left here, utterly confused and unsure of myself.

No matter how long I lived, or how long I had been a vampire, I probably would never think of myself on Edward's level. His amount of perfection and unmarred beauty made me feel inferior and mediocre, like he was a shiny silver Volvo and I was a substandard Chevy clunker. The comparison of our old cars made me smile.

As much as I desperately wanted to be with Edward at this moment, I did not want to mar his wonderful image. Yes, he had hurt me twice in the past, more so than I have ever been hurt and ever will be, but he had done it as an act of compassion, trying to keep me safe, sane, and, well, human. All of his attempts had been futile, however. I had gone catatonic again after he left the second and last time, I had gotten married, been cheated on, worked almost half-way through a divorce, dealt with the death of one of my best friends, Charlie, Renee, leaving Jacob and his family, and, inevitably, I am very much a vampire.

I didn't hold anything against him anymore as I realized he had just been trying to keep me safe. You would think that this realization would be enough to say yes to Edward, to run back to him and jump in his arms like I so, so wanted to do. But no. It wasn't enough. _I _wasn't enough. Nothing I had to offer could even being to compare with what Edward could give me, or anyone. I am not selfless, or perfect. Hell, I'm not even one-hundred percent convinced that I'm sane.

The question that bothered me most, the query that plagued my mind at the moment was why Edward would still want me after all of these long, hard years apart. Why anybody would want me…the answer evaded me entirely.

I simply was not good enough for Felicity or Donny…and apparently not Ayden or Zara. And I was _definitely_ not good enough to deserve the love of Edward Anthony Masen Cullen, no matter how badly I might want it.


	13. The Great Escape

**Blood Lust**

**Ch. 13 – The Great Escape**

Running away had been easier than I first figured it would.

It was a simple matter of leaving everything behind, getting into the car, putting it into reverse, and trying to hide the grim smile that fought to usurp the calm, complacent expression on my inhuman face. Merging into the highway into the dead of night, I was the only pair of headlights on the entire stretch of road for as far as I could see.

The silent hum of my XKR, midnight black to match my intentions and the time of night, was almost depressing. So I put a random CD in the player, turned it up to max volume, and mashed on the gas.

As I raced down the road, the only other competitors in my sick mind games the invisible ghosts of my would-be past, my thoughts raced almost as fast as my car. I knew what I was going to do, and the adrenaline pulsing through my still circulation system made me feel on edge. The plan was simple, easy to remember; wreck the car, and run like hell.

Something clicked in my mind, then, and I realized that my plan was much too cliché. In fact, I had done it already before, to rid myself of Forks. I passed up my designated 'crash spot', and kept down the highway. Seattle changed to western Washington quickly, and through the sheeting rain I urged my car faster, faster. The beat of the music streaming through my speakers made me feel alive again, like my cold, dead heart was actually beating.

As I neared the coast, I chewed on my lip nervously, and found that I accidentally had smashed my handprints permanently into the steering wheel I was gripping it so hard. Warning signs served as a precaution to exit the highway now, as there was a dead end ahead of me. I ignored them and I ignored the exit ramp, steering straight for the giant, bright orange STOP, TURN AROUND sign.

With a smirk on my face I slammed on the brakes, enjoying the squeals my tires emitted. I hydroplaned straight into the stupid sign, and, once on the other side, undid my seatbelt, foot still firmly on the brake though my car was squealing and sliding closer and closer to my would-be doom, and propped my hands behind my head.

As my direction changed suddenly and I realized that I was falling straight down through the velvet night, I allowed a scream of pleasure to escape my cherry lips; for I had done it…I had driven straight off the damn cliff.

Before my car slammed into the concrete wall that was the Pacific Ocean, I put my feet up on the dashboard and planted my patent leather Jimmy Choo stiletto's on the windshield. The car tilted nose-down and I was basically standing on the windshield now, my upper body pressed into the roof of the car. As the car smashed into the water, stopping it dead for a millionth of a second, my body, still traveling as fast as the car had been, shot through the windshield and I slipped into the water feet-first, my vampire skin immune to the sharp shards of glass.

Though it felt like forever to me, the entire process, from flying off the face of the cliff to hitting the water, only took about five seconds.

I swam with ferocity away from the car as it followed me into the water, and shot off like a rocket. I had never even tested my speed under water, but it was almost twice as fast as on land.

After swimming for a few minutes, the false adrenaline still making me almost crazy, I approached the surface and drew in a deep breath, screaming in absolute victory at the top of my lungs.

I had triumphed.

It was dramatic.

It was fun.

I was victorious.

And as the Jaguar and the remnants of my last life sunk to the bottom of the Pacific Ocean, I could already hear the wails and see the lights of police cars in the distance, as someone had surely seen my 'accident' and called it in.

They would search for Isabella Swan for days, maybe even weeks. I would be advertised in the paper and on the news. A tragic accident, they would call it, but it was nothing more than on purpose. I would be everywhere in Seattle, but nowhere near it at the same time. Edward would realize that I wasn't worth it and move on. Felicity and Donny could get along without me. I would miss them, but they were a part of the Old Bella.

I gladly welcomed the New Bella into my body, grinning as I felt my car hit the bottom of the coast almost a mile away, my superb hearing picking up on the shouts of police officers. And I dove under the surface, the frigid water sending an invigorating chill down my spine. I swam for my destiny.

My designer outfit and designer car were absolutely ruined in the total emersion.

Hey, what's so wrong with making a getaway in style?


End file.
